tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19851592311953733512024-03-13T06:51:45.563+05:30Darlings Of Venusmaithilihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13026338900563080890noreply@blogger.comBlogger411125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-2584654957736871582020-08-01T20:32:00.001+05:302020-08-01T20:32:16.768+05:30***** The Craving *****<p dir="ltr">#NarayaniInPonderLust</p>
<p dir="ltr">Sometimes for sweets, sometimes for words,<br>
The craving begins as a small itch that refuses to leave unheard. </p>
<p dir="ltr">It stays within, clogged and heavy... swirling like a blocked chi with no vents...<br>
While the mind continues to deal in mysterious ways, sometimes with brute force and at times, with pretense.</p>
<p dir="ltr">A scoop of caramel custard or a slice of lemon tart seduces the mind with its creamy flavours on one hand....<br>
While a mug of hot choc or a slice of the decadent chocolate cake indulges in the tug of war unmanned!</p>
<p dir="ltr">But that is not what bothers a deviant mind the most.... <br>
For cravings are mere coping mechanisms the mind adopts to stall impending chaos...</p>
<p dir="ltr">While, the meandering thoughts continue to sprout new weeds of uncertainties in the head...<br>
The rational mind struggles to bring the soul back with hope and faith & in good stead!</p>Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-32696572331223098432020-07-27T20:25:00.001+05:302020-07-27T21:09:51.638+05:30*** Envy - the arch nemesis ***<p dir="ltr">#NarayaniInPonderLust</p>
<p dir="ltr">Disillusionment is powerful.</p><p dir="ltr">
More is the anger towards life and fate...</p><p dir="ltr">As often man forgets... his purpose could have been different...</p><p dir="ltr">Whilst he spent his precious life burning in envy to cage the elusive fame...</p>
<p dir="ltr">But as luck would have it,<br>
the butterfly called success flutters with no agenda of her own...</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
As she jumps from one man to another...<br>
She cares little about what emotions feed a life, distraught and forlorn...</p>
<p dir="ltr">It is not the absence of success that breaketh a man...but loss of purpose...<br>
When man measures his goals with the purpose of another soul....</p><p dir="ltr">
He brings down the kingdom of hell on Earth...<br>
With all its devious army of minions and ghouls...</p>
<p dir="ltr">Envy is a termite that devours life with utmost relish...<br>
While the life continues to ponder.... "why did fate play unfair...?"</p><p dir="ltr">
Forgetting that every man has to bear his cross designed for his spine....<br>
The disturbed man continues to walk in circles not realizing - Truth bleeds regardless of who cares...<br><br></p>Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-45211423282883275452020-01-27T18:18:00.001+05:302020-01-27T18:18:43.761+05:30***** Empathy : A lost virtue *****<p dir="ltr">Empathy, the maiden virtue of all times...<br></p><p dir="ltr">The most sought after and least respected of all..</p><p dir="ltr">
Its presence is neither acknowledged nor celebrated...<br><br></p><p dir="ltr">
But its absence brings down the world on its knees, with a mighty fall!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Did they say - Blood is thicker than water...??</p><p dir="ltr">And that, empathy is inevitable when blood is a connection...??</p><p dir="ltr">Just then, exceptions come along to render blood worthless...</p><p dir="ltr">And that, blood is nothing but a coloured water, a wasted sentiment...a useless emotion...!</p>
<p dir="ltr">As self wonders, what kind of apathy must eat a man of the above kind?</p><p dir="ltr">
Who measures his connections based on status, money and clout?</p><p dir="ltr">That he cleaves off connections he was born with....</p><p dir="ltr">With absolutely no pain or remorse?</p>
<p dir="ltr">Humble beginnings are underrated always...</p><p dir="ltr">For none wants to acknowledge the roots...</p><p dir="ltr">But time is such a wheel of whim...</p><p dir="ltr">When the call comes, it brings one down on his boots!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Currencies, clouts and shallow connections are passing clouds of dew...</p><p dir="ltr">That feel good and soothing for a while until the weather changes its moods...</p><p dir="ltr">Never turn your face away from your roots, is what ancestors whisper each day...<br></p><p dir="ltr">
For roots is what shall hold you firm through tides and storms, come what may!</p>Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-8934362323175378202019-10-15T21:56:00.001+05:302019-10-15T21:56:30.413+05:30*** The idea of Justice ***<div align="left"><p dir="ltr">The idea of justice is hard hitting and crude..</p><p dir="ltr">But, the way it unfolds is always a wait that be endured by a strong few...</p></div><div align="left"><p dir="ltr">The wronged ones live with an unsavoury acceptance of an elusive justice...</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
While the ones that wrong continue to push their luck through loopholes and well spun lies...<br>
</p>
</div><div align="left"><p dir="ltr">What is allowed is what will continue, a reprimand that sings aloud after every landslide of the just and fair....</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
Some rules must change to question everything loose lest the hope for the just becomes threadbare...<br>
</p>
</div><div align="left"><p dir="ltr">Luck and time, the poker faced pawns of destiny be flirty and ruthless at the same time...</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
But, push them a tad too much and they jump to zero from the cat's lives nine!<br>
</p>
</div><div align="left"><p dir="ltr">However, the wicked never regret their actions or, the consequences that follow..</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
For that is how they have risen by stepping on graves with a conscience, rotting and hollow...<br>
</p>
</div><div align="left"><p dir="ltr">The onus lies on ones that let the wrong slide by unquestioned....</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
For the morally neutral spectators do more evil By consciously averting the attention...</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
"Will justice prevail?", is an elusive question of the hour...</p><p dir="ltr"><br>
"It will", says the Universe in the future, near or far!<br>
</p>
</div><p dir="ltr"><br>
</p>Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-43481843382100147282019-09-29T14:04:00.001+05:302019-09-29T14:04:51.414+05:30***** How easy, how difficult? *****<p dir="ltr">#NarayaniInPonderLust </p>
<p dir="ltr">To express freely and unapologetically, as one feels like...<br>
Is every life's gift ever since it's born....<br>
The freedom to be oneself with no inhibitions...<br>
Brings along a courage to face everything known unknown..</p>
<p dir="ltr">When a baby hurls its toys across in a sheer expression of 'self',<br>
All in the world capture the moment through captivating words and, 'larger than life' lens...<br>
However, the little life grows up naively owning the freedom as it's right...<br>
Little knowing that freedom is a rubix cube filled with many hushed silences and penance...</p>
<p dir="ltr">For later, an honest "I don't like.....", is chided and, replaced with a pretense suppressing dissent...."ofcourse, I like..."<br>
Which again later manifests into diabetically sweet lie, "Ofcourse, I love...."<br>
While the integrity of words begin to rot under the tyranny of social conditioning and dictum..<br>
The soul now struggles to comprehend where it must stand up, and where, must bow!</p>
<p dir="ltr">"How easy, how difficult" will be a daunting question for eternity...<br>
For we are all the choices we make, not all of them happy and sane....<br>
But then there is no right or wrong when it comes to choices, <br>
For diversions on roads are merely detours..., be it right or left, you take!</p>
<p dir="ltr">That said, every direction to action comes with a consequence...<br>
An uninvited guest or, a pleasant visitor that it can choose to be...<br>
It is always the courage of conviction or, the shame of what comes after that....<br>
That decides how far a soul has come along, at helm of arrogance or, down on one's knees!</p>
<p dir="ltr"><span style="background-color:#D8DFEA;">#PoeticMusings</span> <br></p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-29083376418147776302019-07-04T14:49:00.001+05:302019-07-04T14:49:10.507+05:30You are not good enough!<p dir="ltr">"<i>You are not good enough</i>", the lady heard the lines, a hundred times...<br>
But, NEVER in words or actions but in, accusatory whines and condescending jibes!</p>
<p dir="ltr">What was she NOT good at?, she pondered over and over....<br>
Perhaps, not clearing away the dining table clutter or, the heap of clothes on the side for a week, yet to be folded....</p>
<p dir="ltr">Declutter, declutter....the words now haunt her day and night....<br>
For she wants to now run away from home and routine, to some strange land out of sight!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Bereft of what she expects are the words 'care' and 'respect' !<br>
She now feels like a deflated soul reduced to a role of some disposable help! </p>
<p dir="ltr">In what words could she explain that, she too would love to have tea served to her, once in a blue moon?<br>
For she now feels her culinary skills are anything but a boon!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Fresh food on the table, fresh clothes for the family, clean bathrooms and, timely beverages at call.. <br>
"<i>But aren't they her duties?</i>", and the human brain begins nitpicking the unfinished tasks, that are conveniently gargantuan and tall!</p>
<p dir="ltr">"<i>You will never be good </i><i>enough</i><i>!</i>", the voice has changed from outside to inside...<br>
As she munches on a half burned toast with tears of shame and, a tattered pride!</p>
<p dir="ltr">But now, she knows what she shall allow is what will continue....<br>
As she wipes those tears of hurt, feeling strengthened and new!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Respect is earned, they say...but then, so is love!<br>
Now, she must make sure that others know that too, steady and slow!</p>
<p dir="ltr"><b><i>Take care of her in the way she seeks!</i></b><br>
<b><i>And you will get her back in the way you dream!</i></b><br></p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-39529133899392883182019-05-31T14:33:00.001+05:302019-05-31T15:49:00.736+05:30Pregnant fears<p dir="ltr">Realizing too many blessings at times is overwhelming...<br>
For fear of losing them is as strong and unrelenting..</p>
<p dir="ltr">Sometimes, the realization helps better by keeping the feet on the ground...<br>
But at times, it also weakens the core with pregnant fears that make the mind morose and unsound...</p>
<p dir="ltr">People say, get over your fears...for fear is a sign of weakness...<br>
But will they ever know, how much it takes to not let the unknown demons from the mind's harness?</p>
<p dir="ltr">Mind, a contorted abyss can never be explained in mere words of Math and Science...<br>
Even as humans claim to know it all about the submissive body and the unrestrained mind....</p>
<p dir="ltr">While words set me free for a while, I wonder....where do these pregnant fears stem from?<br>
The answers, I believe are linked with my life' purpose, a pandora box of soothing shores and raging storms!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Maybe, pregnant fears follow me for a reason....<br>
To see the unseen, to feel the unfelt...to hear the unsaid...while sailing through every season!</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-36770199283669918482019-05-18T10:12:00.001+05:302019-05-18T10:13:31.795+05:30The Thing called Hurt<p dir="ltr">Words and emotions are two sides of a coin...<br>
For they rarely walk in tandem, without crossing the line...</p>
<p dir="ltr">When awkward silences are left unhealed....<br>
Hurt manifests like a demon with glee...</p>
<p dir="ltr">And then, when even a small disagreement goes awry...<br>
A can of ugly confrontations hurts the ears and eyes...</p>
<p dir="ltr">How words and actions are perceived, will remain an unsolved mystery....<br>
For minds are universes with intangible galaxies of brewing thoughts and feelings...</p>
<p dir="ltr">Maybe that is why, they say silence is golden when words of hurt embolden....<br>
For silence may not weed out the hurt but, perfectly camouflages the weight of sadness, a formidable burden...</p>
<p dir="ltr">But, even as silence stalls the conflicting emotions and anger from spewing out...<br>
The inevitable truth of unresolved issues will someday, like a canary, sing aloud....</p>
<p dir="ltr">Which is why, words must be filtered before they leave the tongue...<br>
For nothing can repair the impact of hurt, once the words have been flung!</p>
<p dir="ltr"><span style="background-color:#D8DFEA;">#NarayaniInPonderLust</span> </p>
<p dir="ltr"><span style="background-color:#D8DFEA;">#PoeticMusings</span> <br>
</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-38343996250568230622019-04-24T17:30:00.001+05:302019-04-24T17:30:25.034+05:30Roots : the unseen anchors <p dir="ltr"><span style="background-color:#D8DFEA;">#NarayaniInPonderLust</span> </p>
<p dir="ltr">Somewhere in this journey of life, a lot of events got buried in the Chest called the Past!</p>
<p dir="ltr">For Time & Tide wait for none and, the ride from the Present now seems quite Fast!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Is it those flaccid years of unrespiteful challenges or, years of overrated fun?</p>
<p dir="ltr">It is difficult to choose for life is an unpredictable pun!</p>
<p dir="ltr">To soar high and fly or, to stay rooted for life?</p>
<p dir="ltr">The choice is unsettling in the Destiny's roll of dice!</p>
<p dir="ltr">But then, there comes a time when the need to return back to roots arrives...</p>
<p dir="ltr">And then, the truth dawns that for every step away from roots, there tags along a heavy price! </p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-39986504373371046482019-04-06T09:37:00.001+05:302019-04-06T09:37:04.962+05:30Appeasement : the eighth sin<p dir="ltr"><span style="background-color:#D8DFEA;">#NarayaniInPonderLust</span> </p>
<p dir="ltr"><span style="background-color:#D8DFEA;">#PoeticMusings</span> </p>
<p dir="ltr">Enough was never enough and, never will be.......<br>
For, greed is a madness that spreads like a plague with a wicked glee!</p>
<p dir="ltr">But, irony strikes midway and, reminds why respect is missing from the scene.....<br>
And then, with all platters filled with accolades, respect seems to be one elusive queen!</p>
<p dir="ltr">The more it is sought with vengeance, the more it evades....<br>
After all, truth is raw and crass and is always delivered in spades!</p>
<p dir="ltr">To stop chasing respect and, start earning it, is the only way....<br>
Because, NO amount of appeasement and arrogance can ever make it stay!<br>
</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-30301234006013547382019-03-23T18:18:00.001+05:302019-03-23T19:26:47.736+05:30Threshold<p dir="ltr">You are NOT often surrounded by those you would want to choose....<br>
As life sits back, with some popcorn on how you maintain your threshold and, play your ruse!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Such are those moments when you  feel morose and, completely let down...<br>
Because your tryst with your destiny is sailing on a trough, rough and forlorn...</p>
<p dir="ltr">So, you question the Universe <i>, "Why do you hurl at me, the bad eggs everyone despise....?"</i><br>
While the realization dawns within..that such meetings great or otherwise, are sly chances in the massive roll of the unpredictable dice!</p>
<p dir="ltr">So, you sit and gulp down the dejection and disgust, waiting patiently for some change in the winds...<br>
The same rut and routine continue to manifest in all shades of mundane and, all depressing prints...</p>
<p dir="ltr">The wait therefore begins for the ugly knock on the threshold line.. because there is a lot of anger held at bay...<br>
Once the line is crossed, the games shall change and, every linen will be out on the fray!</p>
<p dir="ltr"><i>"Don't meddle with thresholds of fine people",</i> the wise men say...<br>
Breaching their thresholds is sacrilege as the time shall come for the perpetrators to pay....</p>
<p dir="ltr">Threshold is not to be crossed or touched<u>.</u>...., a word of caution to the free flowing winds.....<br>
Because, every one out there is answerable for his great deeds and, infamous sins....</p>
<p dir="ltr">Hope, great positions embrace more of those with character, integrity, humility and intellect..<br>
So that, the motivation to tread the journey uphill burns bright and optimistic in all the generations that line up next..</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-70730405376499477852019-03-20T12:11:00.001+05:302019-03-20T12:20:29.271+05:30We are all the children of Time<p dir="ltr">Every second, every instant is a strange colour invented by Time..<br>
That comes with a hidden herring in red - Never cross that line!</p>
<p dir="ltr">When the instant arrives, one always assumes he is ready...<br>
But, that is when the tables turn making him unsteady...</p>
<p dir="ltr">While the stairs towards success change strength and sides<br>
Moments of bleak let the hope and faith glide...</p>
<p dir="ltr">And, at some point during the distress call.... <br>
One sees along many... testimony to - 'Pride goes before a fall!'</p>
<p dir="ltr">'Moment of epiphany' is what they call it?<br>
Which awakens the soul that lies helpless at the bottom of the pit?</p>
<p dir="ltr">And, in that second it dawns...that<br>
There is no written manual to manouevre the machine called Time..<br>
Because Time never cautions us before we just step over the line!</p>
<p dir="ltr">But, that is how humans are, partly naive and, partly clever....<br>
Impulses are strong as they command...it is - now or never!</p>
<p dir="ltr">Because there is a lot to let go and, a lot to embrace.. <br>
After all, Vices and virtues are two halves of the same mysterious face..</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-38522037054626491632019-03-19T12:43:00.001+05:302019-03-19T12:44:13.798+05:30The thing called arrogance!<p dir="ltr">I watch with attention, the arrogant crowd.<br>
Because they teach you all about life.. <br>
With empathy almost empty and, apathy too loud,<br>
They expose you to the ugly world of strife...</p>
<p dir="ltr">They continue to make mistakes, one after the other...<br>
Not knowing when to stop.....<br>
Because ambitions are way too blinding, full of stupor....<br>
That they deliriously chase to save their conniving plot!</p>
<p dir="ltr">With every passing day, I watch the arrogance reach new heights<br>
As they gloat with glee, crossing over every mine they set for others, in order to succeed....<br>
But, time is a strange thing to fight...<br>
Because, it reserves its special rewards regardless of caste and creed.. </p>
<p dir="ltr">I watch with rapt attention <u>now</u> at how high they crave to fly...<br>
And, I look forward to what happens next when they ascend the greatest Himalayan heights...<br>
Will the tyrants reign, or 'eat the humble pie'?<br>
Every life, I learn, good or bad, is indeed a lesson in disguise!</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-56827190799996041842018-08-19T20:44:00.001+05:302018-08-19T20:44:28.025+05:30Words from a ponderlusting girl.....<p dir="ltr">Words are such powerful daggers...<br>
They cut deep into the heart and soul...<br>
Hurt, Angst, fear and anger....<br>
Creep into the being like ghastly ghouls....</p>
<p dir="ltr">Sometimes self sits and ponders....<br>
Why should silence be a reply to all trolls?<br>
And then, a voice nudges from the yonder...<br>
Correcting arrogance is not your goal!</p>
<p dir="ltr">But then, the crass words continue to bother....<br>
Creating in the heart, countless chaotic holes...<br>
Will the heart continue to take in all the banter??<br>
To which the voice silently whispers...."your life, a mystery is yet to unfold...'</p>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-57677512121917416052018-01-16T20:09:00.002+05:302018-01-16T20:09:57.317+05:30The sailor named She.<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8r1HCt845ow/Wl4OpjcQxbI/AAAAAAAAGPI/DQlxHftYauUgO1nTlydtC9VDLod7Fz8nQCLcBGAs/s1600/ss1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="463" data-original-width="470" height="315" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8r1HCt845ow/Wl4OpjcQxbI/AAAAAAAAGPI/DQlxHftYauUgO1nTlydtC9VDLod7Fz8nQCLcBGAs/s320/ss1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A million storms erupt within her</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
while the face continues to play stoic as ever…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Woes, fears and the many intangibles of destiny</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
persistently plague her with all alacrity….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Expectations and disappointments continue to play her mind</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
while SHE struggles through each day with sources of fresh
hope to find…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As the chores of the grind seem to keep her busy as a bee</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
though the nights bring along the countless pregnant fears in
absolute fury!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With no respite from the concurrent deluge of worries….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Her mind is tired and, so is her body….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And, the rogue tides of health continue to play havoc</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
but, prayers and good wishes pitch in to brave the tides,
steady though slow…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
SHE looks above and wonders - Life is a book with pages in black and
white…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
One page the destiny doodles while the other page we write……</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Only that we do now know which is which…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Until, the time comes and unveils its predictably
unpredictable pitch….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yet, SHE continues to adjust the sails of her ship….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Because the fight is a must even if the foe is another iceberg
tip…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In the life that gave her more storms than sun shines…..</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
SHE musters all courage with hope and faith to steer the
Black Pearl of her life…..</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><i>Victory be hers!</i></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><i>More power to her!</i></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><i>May the Universe shower all glory on her!</i></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><i><br /></i></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
P.S: This poem is dedicated to all those women who silently survive each day with a never ending verve to live. </div>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-76283202052697325772017-10-06T03:54:00.002+05:302017-10-06T03:54:51.729+05:30Test of Time !<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
This is not how it was meant to be or how I had imagined it
would be. It was all supposed to be happy and nice and if not this then it
wasn’t even supposed to be this traumatizing. It was love at first sight. I
didn’t know who you were but I wanted to know. For you I didn’t even exist at
the time I was falling for you. How can somebody feel so much of attraction for
the other without even knowing them. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We became friends and then something more than friends. I
was scared. Every single person aware of this drama of ours had warned me to
maintain a safe distance from you. ‘You will get hurt. You will end up crying
in whatever this thing of yours is called’ – were some of the words. I still
listened to my heart and ignored the brain.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Do you have a girlfriend ?”, I asked several times and
below are the replies presented in chronological order in appearance in due
time.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
1. Mundane Silence<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
2. Who are you to ask me that<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
3. Bitch<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
4. Didn’t you know everything that now you are doing drama
every other day about it<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I gave you everything. I was honest with my feelings. If you
would have told me in first place that you have a girlfriend, I would have
maintained my distance from you. I am not someone who would try to snatch you
from another girl. Neither do I have those skills nor do I know tactics to do
that. But I expected you to be honest with me as well in return. And now that
you ask me is too much for me to handle. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You want to be in my life till the
point you want and in the way you want and then when the time comes for you to
be with your girl, you don’t want me to utter a single word and just watch you
leave to marry her. And before that end point you want me to be normal and let
everything go as if it’s only us and nothing else. How do I do that? Why am I
in such a situation? How do I behave normal and be all friendly and everything
else with you when I know I mean nothing to you? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In my dreams I see you
marrying her and me being alone for the rest of my life. I see the that as the
future and this is not how I had imagined it to be!<o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Smitahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16386118079768296841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-36192332781286729842017-09-26T06:08:00.005+05:302017-09-26T06:16:06.096+05:30Things words do !<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: center;">
I am so tired</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Out of energy</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I feel like crying - I feel sick</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Wanna go home and sleep</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Wish I had my mom next to me</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Taking care of her girl</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
---------------------------------------------</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Ping Pong - the phone was ringing</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Few words to turn pain into smiling</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Strange but true , this is what you make things do</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
"How's your health", 'that's all I wanna know'<br />
were all the words to make pain go!</div>
</div>
Smitahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16386118079768296841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-14521357096266618242017-05-15T10:40:00.000+05:302017-05-15T10:40:18.431+05:30Bionic Superhumans and Pocket money- Musings on Mother's day<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
My son and I were watching Phineas and Ferb cartoon on Netflix together.Suddenly he looked at me and said, "You know none of this can be real , right Amma?". They had been learning fiction and non -fiction in school and I tried to bring in those concepts as I replied. Of course this is fiction, it is an imaginary story. I'm sure kids like them would not be able to build such complicated things so easily. So is the other TV show with bionic humans", referring to a sci-fi comedy that we all watched called Lab Rats which had 3 bionic children as its main protagonists. To which he indignantly replied , "Bionic humans are not fiction, I'm quite sure science is very close to humans having bionic chips and implants, may be they have already done it somewhere." Before I could get another word in he got back to the topic<br />
<br />
"I mean , I can totally get that they are super smart and able to create roller coasters , what I can't understand is , how would they ever get the money to build those things" ,he mused. Personally I had not thought of that as an impediment and to foster debate , suggested that may be Phineas and Ferb's parents were very rich and they gave them a lot of pocket money. At this he started laughing loudly and said "Amma you don't get it , no parents would give kids so much pocket money. It has to be fiction."<br />
<br />
I chuckled to myself.We live in an age where super smart children and bionic super humans are close to reality. But thankfully parents are still parents and children receiving huge amounts in pocket money is still fiction.<br />
<br />
Many times , we tend to forget that our children live in a world far more advanced than we can comprehend and seeing it through their curious eyes is a gift to cherish.<br />
<br />
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!<br />
<br />
<b>P.S :</b> It does look like bionic humans are coming for real.<br />
<a href="http://www.cnbc.com/2017/02/13/elon-musk-humans-merge-machines-cyborg-artificial-intelligence-robots.html">http://www.cnbc.com/2017/02/13/elon-musk-humans-merge-machines-cyborg-artificial-intelligence-robots.html</a><br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Sunitha Vijayanarayanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01456891222849014131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-78553175380149080322017-04-11T06:32:00.002+05:302017-04-11T06:33:02.998+05:30Closed...What you had opened!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I closed</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">what you opened</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I had to close</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">What you opened</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">My heart bleeding</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Sliced by your lies</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">My arteries </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Cut by your false promises</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Blood kept flowing</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">No attempt made to stop it</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I tried not to get hurt</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Yet no bandaid ever surfaced</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">You are nice</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">So am I</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Maybe thats the reason why</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I had to die</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Smitahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16386118079768296841noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-85926445929594715292017-03-26T10:57:00.001+05:302017-03-26T10:58:29.852+05:30Praise<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Once in a while</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Everybody needs praise</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Praise in the form of words</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Praise in the form of care</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>It need not be precious gift of words</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Just a simple nice word will do</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>It need not be an expensive gift</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Just some time to spare will do</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>It need not be extravagant act</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Just a tight hug will do</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>As once in a while</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>everybody needs praise !</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J3qoetePWdg/WNdRSZgO33I/AAAAAAAAKYA/zJNgMvVJQHgvy7mAo3_UO7gCyHKSZnhBwCLcB/s1600/3a5ee6e32bbeb07f32c452d0fcbf0ced.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J3qoetePWdg/WNdRSZgO33I/AAAAAAAAKYA/zJNgMvVJQHgvy7mAo3_UO7gCyHKSZnhBwCLcB/s320/3a5ee6e32bbeb07f32c452d0fcbf0ced.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
</div>
Smitahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16386118079768296841noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-28885805901340458872017-03-17T14:14:00.000+05:302017-03-17T14:14:25.623+05:30When Happy Memories sting.....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ScyKzO9f844/WMuhqgcviOI/AAAAAAAAE7I/PvRy-k6VEqQl9YZinMHo1BoafOjDzbBPwCLcB/s1600/tears.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="289" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ScyKzO9f844/WMuhqgcviOI/AAAAAAAAE7I/PvRy-k6VEqQl9YZinMHo1BoafOjDzbBPwCLcB/s400/tears.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With hands held and love shared,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Many places traveled far and wide....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Memories made with kisses and walks,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It seemed the time was with their stride.....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Does time care about one’s pace?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The question always haunted me in the past</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Did it care about the memories made?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I guess, it did not.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Good times make good memories</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Giving one so much to fall back on....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The same good memories become stingers of pain</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As soon as the dark clouds loom large with the Sun now
gone....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Happy memories are now stingers</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Leaving no place to hide</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The good times are dead ringers</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That challenge you now to surf past the tide!</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-1075535448150071762017-03-15T12:32:00.000+05:302017-03-15T12:34:31.608+05:30“What brings us together is what pulls us apart” – Grief, thou hurt.<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-XRgjBZ4fVfQ/WMjnH33hYUI/AAAAAAAAE6o/5NgTHQn0LZUAvlyA9Lrn6yLX9os-5hadgCLcB/s1600/grr.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="105" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-XRgjBZ4fVfQ/WMjnH33hYUI/AAAAAAAAE6o/5NgTHQn0LZUAvlyA9Lrn6yLX9os-5hadgCLcB/s320/grr.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Grief is a burning flame</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It numbs your mind and scars your soul</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When it swings its blade of misery</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It chases you like a nasty ghoul</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And then, somewhere down the road</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You meet a tall white wall</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That holds the weight of resistance</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Which you try to climb but, receive a tumbling fall! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The thud gives you the moment of truth</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The one that you needed but did not want</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That it was time to turn back and fight the grief</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And finish its agenda of haunts and taunts!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So you turn, with your back pressed against the wall</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And, take a deep breath as you stare deep into the eyes of
Grief</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While it continues to taunt your climbs and falls</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You look down at your crusty feet and bruised knees....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With nowhere to go, you close your eyes...</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And slowly, the wicked laughter fades away like a withered
flower</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You realize your anger as it rises from the ashes....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As to do or die becomes your weapon of power...</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Epiphany of a moment it is,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When you startle grief’s verve with your healing scars! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And then, you take the first leap over it like a feisty fawn</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Because, the journey is not yet over and, the destination is yet so far!</div>
Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-61104692455288738682017-03-15T01:17:00.001+05:302017-03-15T01:17:37.298+05:30Demons<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;">The anger</span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">The pain</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">When you don't let it out</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">It starts eating up the soul from inside</span></div>
</span><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">You let your anger out</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">You are termed insane</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">Seen as someone mad who just doesn't know how to take things</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">Somebody who's insensitive enough to show their sensitive side in public</span></div>
</span><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">You gulp ďown your anger</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">You spend days misguided, starving evenings and nights crying</span><span style="font-size: 12.8px;"> </span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">Smile gets away from your dictionary and it seems like happiness never existed</span></div>
</span><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">What demon you choose</span></div>
</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">Decides the course of what demon you shall become</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4NOjjPKaEBg/WMhIsoJ8BgI/AAAAAAAAKXc/Bc9BGXGBjmIXH6b7_PhwCSFToZhevtz-ACLcB/s1600/5899c095f774c4b387045440c7de16f8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="317" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4NOjjPKaEBg/WMhIsoJ8BgI/AAAAAAAAKXc/Bc9BGXGBjmIXH6b7_PhwCSFToZhevtz-ACLcB/s320/5899c095f774c4b387045440c7de16f8.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: 12.8px;"><br /></span></div>
</span></div>
Smitahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16386118079768296841noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-9659686935290398982017-03-14T12:10:00.001+05:302017-03-14T12:14:15.091+05:30Blow of the void<div class="MsoNormal">
Love is the elixir of life</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So says the Lord</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When souls come down on Earth</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
They meet in the name of God</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When they come together in body and soul, </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Destiny plays love, passion and togetherness in its fiddle</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While the dice of life plays music to the ears</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As long as the puppeteer wishes to keep some notes hidden</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Life is perfect, yes it is.... </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As long as long as the roads are wide and straight</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And then, come the deafening cliffs that spurt from nowhere</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While the game of destiny begins to unravel its traits.....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The void arrives like the sword of death...</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With its jagged edge cutting deep into the soul </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The jolt is so sudden and fierce....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While the blow continues to rip away not a part but a whole</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Unpredictable I am, so says the life </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I dabble in dark stormy nights and bright sunshine days</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With eccentric and complex forms that I take, I have no warnings to give</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Because, I am designed to play my pawns in His mysterious
ways.....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Amen.</div>
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Narayani Karthikhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02393961304987444855noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985159231195373351.post-16816402777657901932017-02-25T12:16:00.000+05:302017-02-25T12:16:20.401+05:30A mighty heart<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<img alt="Image result for a mighty heart book cover" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/6f/Mariane_pearl.JPG" /><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i> w2</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i> Image: <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Mighty_Heart">Credit</a></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i> "<b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt;">Danny is back before four
P.M. for a brief visit. As usual, I run into his arms and bury my face in his
neck. I stay there, wanting to get drunk on his smell, wanting to feel some of
his sweat. I do not like to be separated from him. Sometimes, after I've gone
somewhere, I find him at the front door waiting for my return. He takes me in
his arms and tells me how much he has missed me. He squeezes me tight with one
hand, and with the other, he caresses my face, calling me "My wife, my
life."</span></b></i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt;"><br /></span></b></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">Occasionally
I like to be separated from him for a few days just to savor this feeling </span></b><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">we have -- painful but delicious -- when the one we love is absent. </span></b><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">Just for the pleasure of finding him again when he comes to pick </span></b><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">me up at the airport. Of reading the emails he sends me from a stop in transit </span></b><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">for the mere pleasure of hearing him tell me, "I'm on my way." </span></b><b><span style="background: white; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 107%;">Only when I am back with him do I feel whole.</span></b></i></span><div>
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I have never identified with a text as much as this one. While I read this book, I only wished it was just fiction. But, the sad truth is that this book is about the real life and death of a journalist Daniel Pearl and this book is written by his wife who was five months pregnant when she was widowed.</div>
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2002, I was just a ten year old intently following the news of kidnapping of an American journalist in Pakistan, Daniel Pearl. I read the Indian Express which covered the news on front page with Daniel's photo splashed, a gentle smiling photograph. Sitting in the comforts of my house and living a life that nowhere coincided with him, I imagined him to be a lone journalist on a mission in Pakistan and his family worrying about him back in America. Militant outfits were not much heard of except for 9/11 attacks and terror was only about riots. Then one day, the wait was over. It was confirmed that Daniel was brutally beheaded and Indian Express shifted to other front page news. </div>
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2011, I happened to watch Angelina Jolie starrer movie- A mighty heart. I did not know what it was about. As the movie progressed, it all came back to me. This time I was able to connect to the story because I happened to be in love with someone who was away from me. I could feel the desperation and pain in the scenes. In one particular scene, Daniel's wife is shown to be scared of the false alarms of his death and sends "I love you" message to his number. I couldn't hold my tears. She was very much in Pakistan when Daniel was kidnapped. She was a five months pregnant mum-to-be hoping for a very different future than what she was destined to. She lived the ordeal for two weeks, waiting for her husband to return unscathed. I just couldn't get her out of my mind and wanted to ready the book. I looked for it, but the copies were limited and out of stock. </div>
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2017, I finally found the book on Amazon. Frankly I had forgotten all about it after my initial attempts. I started reading the book a week back and I have had my heart ripped apart for every page that I read. As a wife, I could not even bare to read about it without having a lump in my throat. </div>
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I couldn't stop smiling all three days of my wedding ceremony. Even though my cheeks hurt, my grin wouldn't fade away. I spoon with my husband in my sleep, feeling safe, this is my happy place. I do not feel alright away from him. Every morning, I just hold on to him before he leaves for work, savoring his warm hug, hoping to come back into his arms when I return from work. We stay away from each other when I visit my parents and I cannot hold myself when I reach the airport and see him waiting for me. That feeling of being united after some time away is priceless. There are days when he goes out for business and I spend my time tracking him. Each message is a reassurance that we will be together soon. He stops to send me a message whenever he is out of town, keeping me updated of his location and flight schedule. </div>
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Mariane Pearl happened to be a wife just like me! She described the exact same things that were true for her, before that fateful day. Unlike me, she was accompanying her husband to the most dangerous places to search for answers. Two journalists who were on the front line to give a voice to people irrespective of their race, caste or gender. Danny died doing the exact same things.</div>
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To be honest, I have had nightmares since I started reading this. We don't have to go hunting for answers in remote corners of the world. Terror strikes us right in the heart of our comforts. It was as if Mariane was voicing all of my fears through her book. Some nights I would think of her when I lay beside my husband, who slept peacefully next to me. I wanted to just hold time because I felt so unsure of all the things in my life. Of life itself. As the book was nearing to an end, Mariane passed on a very positive message which just shows how courageous she is. </div>
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In the book, Mariane refers to Daniel as a mighty heart. But, for me she is the epitome of strength. There are things that you expect from a human being, a wife at that, when a catastrophe like this strikes. But Mariane stood strong. Not crying on television when Danny was kidnapped, because she thought there might be a chance that Danny was watching and she had to be strong for him and let him know that she and the baby were well. Not showing fear, because showing fear would mean those who kidnapped Danny had won. Not giving up on life after his death, because she had to keep him alive within herself. To give him a chance at life through their son, Adam. To let the spirit of Danny live through her.</div>
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Mariane and Daniel had made Mumbai temporarily their home. It saddened me that Mariane did not have a very good memory of India. I wish she had been treated better, I wish she had received more warmth and I wished we as a nation could have given her a better picture of us. It only shows how inhospitable, narrow minded and reserved we become sometimes when we deal with people who stand for things that are alien for us. </div>
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I have reviewed books in the past but I do not think there has ever been a book that has affected me so much. I do not intend to review this book, because this post is not about review, this post is about lives and about strength. This book is about how no matter who you are, some emotions are universal. This book is an ode to a strong marriage of two strong individuals, a love story that continued beyond life.</div>
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P.S: Text in bold are excerpts from the book "A mighty heart"</div>
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maithilihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13026338900563080890noreply@blogger.com5