Goodbyes are never easy. Not when you are saying it to a way of life, to a lifetime of memories, to family. I am standing and staring at an important event to unravel. I have been running around shops, dropping down on the couch with all the bags, making lists of things on my mind. All without a moment to stop and wonder. Now that the day is about to descend on me, I feel the weight of it. It is more than all the bags that are packed and lying all about the house. Two decades of existence cannot be just folded into bags and carried away.
Every girl has been given generous dose of preparation for this day. "What will you do at your inlaws house?", "Who will do this for you at your inlaws house?", "Its ok if you do all this here, will your inlaws tolerate such behavior?", every girl has heard of it enough times, if not by parents then by every nosy relative! Its known all along that a daughter has to leave the house. Yet, nothing prepares a girl for this day. The day she has to leave her home. For me, that day is about to come.
It feels like someone seriously played with time! It feel like just some days back I was learning to ride a bicycle. Dad kept running, holding the handle and seat so that I don't fall. I sometimes ran a wheel over his feet and although it hurt, he kept on having my back until I managed to balance myself.
I feel terrified to think of waking up with a fever and not having Mom to run to. Of not having her constantly feel my temperature or check on me. Not having her company to indulge in paani puri. Of not being pampered by her with gifts and little goodies. Of coming home thinking of some food and not having her to keep that ready, without me telling anything about it!
I feel armless without the little brother. The one who would be partner in crime. The one who would get me a box of erasers because I kept losing them. The one who would come all the way back from college just to receive a courier for me. The one who would say, "Don't worry. I am there, I would take the blame."
I feel so blessed to have such a wonderful family.
My romance with the city is about to end. Mumbai, how shall you ever go out of me!
The city that gave me multiple cultures to imbibe. The city that taught me that relations deeper than blood can be formed with people of various histories. The city where the most grass root class of people have important values to share. The city which gave me the best of friends, the best kind of exposure and the city where I came home at 12.30 am from work and still felt safe.
How shall I ever say goodbye to the booksellers outside stations who get some of the best books at great deals so that the bibliophile in me is at peace? How shall I ever say goodbye to the shopkeepers who have known me over the years? How shall I ever say goodbye to the people I would drop to visit without notice and be welcomed wholeheartedly? Goodbyes are never enough!
If only all these could be packed in suitcases!
pic courtesy: inloveandwar.ca
Every girl has been given generous dose of preparation for this day. "What will you do at your inlaws house?", "Who will do this for you at your inlaws house?", "Its ok if you do all this here, will your inlaws tolerate such behavior?", every girl has heard of it enough times, if not by parents then by every nosy relative! Its known all along that a daughter has to leave the house. Yet, nothing prepares a girl for this day. The day she has to leave her home. For me, that day is about to come.
It feels like someone seriously played with time! It feel like just some days back I was learning to ride a bicycle. Dad kept running, holding the handle and seat so that I don't fall. I sometimes ran a wheel over his feet and although it hurt, he kept on having my back until I managed to balance myself.
I feel terrified to think of waking up with a fever and not having Mom to run to. Of not having her constantly feel my temperature or check on me. Not having her company to indulge in paani puri. Of not being pampered by her with gifts and little goodies. Of coming home thinking of some food and not having her to keep that ready, without me telling anything about it!
I feel armless without the little brother. The one who would be partner in crime. The one who would get me a box of erasers because I kept losing them. The one who would come all the way back from college just to receive a courier for me. The one who would say, "Don't worry. I am there, I would take the blame."
I feel so blessed to have such a wonderful family.
My romance with the city is about to end. Mumbai, how shall you ever go out of me!
The city that gave me multiple cultures to imbibe. The city that taught me that relations deeper than blood can be formed with people of various histories. The city where the most grass root class of people have important values to share. The city which gave me the best of friends, the best kind of exposure and the city where I came home at 12.30 am from work and still felt safe.
How shall I ever say goodbye to the booksellers outside stations who get some of the best books at great deals so that the bibliophile in me is at peace? How shall I ever say goodbye to the shopkeepers who have known me over the years? How shall I ever say goodbye to the people I would drop to visit without notice and be welcomed wholeheartedly? Goodbyes are never enough!
If only all these could be packed in suitcases!
pic courtesy: inloveandwar.ca
9 comments:
:* will miss you so so so much!!! :'(
God I love booksellers in Mumbai. I could spend weeks just there
Come on, Maithz! The day is here and it is in all glory that it is reaching out to you. I understand the heaviness that you're feeling. I went through the same thing 10 months ago and pulling through it was not an easy job.
But now is the time to focus on the new home and family who are looking your way with eager eyes, to welcome you into their arms. Yes, a daughter always has to leave her home and family and nothing prepares us for this. But this is a necessary change. You are always a daughter to your parents and Mumbai will always remain your home. Take the ride as it goes and you will tell me yourself how the ride was in a while :)
So you will be in Bangalore after marriage or am I confusing the places?
All the best for the Big Day...
Let happiness suffocate you that the homesickness gets squeezed out!
Here is to new writes, new insights. All the best my friend.
Beautifully put Maithili :) All the best!
"Dad kept running, holding the handle and seat so that I don't fall. "...
You nailed it down,indeed its true for everyone the context of goodbye might differ.
This will sure pass and you will have loads of memories to share in your new world of cheese
this is beautifully written!
Goodbye really hurts at first. It's hard when the life you're saying goodbye to is really good. You'll get used to it. Especially if you have a wonderful family.
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