September 23, 2014

You Are a Girl

Posted by DeeDee at 11:26 AM
"This is so unladylike"
"Wear something longer, cover your legs, is this how you sit at home"
"Learn to cook, else your in laws will say parents have taught nothing to the girl"
"Why is that neckline so deep"
"Wear a salwar kameez, we are traveling by 2AC remember"
"Let your brother go, he is a boy. You cant go its 10pm already"
"She is in one of "those" days"

Are these phrases familiar?
I am a woman, I have breasts, I have a vagina. But,  that doesn't make me any less human. Does it?
Yes, I wear a bra. Doesn't mean that I expect you to judge my size.
I go through PMS, mood swings, cramps, cravings, periods every month. That doesn't make me any unpure than I was a few days back.

I get stared upon, I get whistles, I get comments, I get groped from men of varied age group.
Doesn't matter what outfit I'm in. Doesn't matter what time of the day it is. I'm like a public property.
If I wear or act like myself, and "Myself" may differ from the conceptions of different people, then I'm bound to get teased and raped. I asked for it. Just because I don't fit the bill of a "normal girl" its OK for me to be leered at.
I am a girl, I can't party alone. I have to have a male company. And not just any male company, it has to be my brother, father or husband.
I'm a characterless slut if I go out dancing with my guy friends.

A guy proposes me, I reject him. I invite him to throw acid on my and ruin my life.
I propose a guy, I an easy girl.
I stay in a urban city, travel places alone, well, according to the people staying in not-so-urban cities I must be sleeping and making out with everyone and not the "marriage material".

I get promoted. I am sleeping with my boss. I have no talent of my own, I have no achievements in my career. My only achievement is I have a vagina.
My would-be husband may have had a gazellion girlfriends, and might have visited Bangkok many times. But, if I have fallen in love when I was younger. I was a bad girl and not worthy to carry a heir of another family in my womb.

I get married. My parents have tried their best to give me everything. They provided me the best education and values. But, I couldn't give my in-laws money. I have the right to be thrown out or burnt alive.
I have a baby. I have a cute little girl. But, I should have had a son. Its only my fault that I don't have a son. Its not my husband's fault. I and my daughter deserve no home.

I lose my husband. I am coping up with his death. I deserve to be treated as a dead human too. No good dresses, no colors, no good food, no attending any functions. Yes, I have to be treated as a corpse, because I am a woman.

Why is this world like this?
Why cant a woman celebrate individuality?
Why are we women all about tits and ass only?
Why are we treated as objects?

All these talks about women's liberation, is in the end of the day just talks.
Even good educated families put their restrictions on women, to look good in the society.
From her attire to her lifestyle, nothing is her choice. Its just the society's norm.
If she tries to take  a different route, either she is tagged with some vulgar name, raped, or killed.

I hope, my daughter or my grand daughter or my great grand daughter would live in a world where she lives like herself.


Keirthana on September 23, 2014 at 2:08 PM said...

*Stands up and applauds* I am proud of you for writing this post. We get so many things thrown at us just because we are women. How can there be such a discrimination when we are just one out of the two genders? Why is there the bias? Sigh! When will we get answers?

DEE DEE on September 23, 2014 at 4:08 PM said...

:) when will we get answers is a question which may never be answered

Zankhana Thakker on September 24, 2014 at 2:36 PM said...

Very Strong and Profound I must say.
The change has to start from us , coz if we become the Change we want to see in the society, Our Surroundings Gradually and eventually does Change. It takes a LOTTT of Strength and hardwork and Unflinching Faith in Oneself. But I would say Yes your wish about your grand daughter and great grand daughter could be fullfilled, but only with a lott of hardwork from your end. I say this coz I have a Daughter. and every since her birth its been an everyday struggle to give her the correct values in a completely Confused and biased Society. But i dont give up and nor should any women who believes that Women are equal and sometimes even above Men in all aspects !

DEE DEE on September 25, 2014 at 3:11 PM said...

Zankhana *Respects*

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