What comes in your mind when in you hear the below mentioned incidents? Like when we hear any crime news in some 'breaking news' channel, most of us has somewhere in our mind that it doesn't happens in our social circle. Read this:
Incident 1: A mother who delivered her baby 7 months back and has been working in a MNC prior to her delivery has to stay back at her parents' house. Her husband has visited her only twice and MIL once post delivery even if the distance between two places is within 30 Kms. All the expenses of delivery and post that is taken care by the parents of the girl as her own salary/savings account is controlled solely by her husband who happens to be a well known orthopaedic surgeon. They made her and her new born feel uncomfortable & unwelcome in all possible ways. Should I have to mention here that new born is a girl!!!
Incident 2: A single mother who works in a bank is beaten black & blue by her brother. He along with his family members justifies this action as an action he did to discipline (!!) his sister. As per him just because she is earning and has 'no man' in her life to control her therefore he obliged to volunteer for taking up the task of controlling her.
Incident 3: A hearing-speech impaired girl is married off to some person (hiding the truth) by her family members. Obviously they find out & send back the girl to her parent's place while she was pregnant. Her husband was furious that girl's parents have fooled him by passing on a 'defective piece'. Her kid was born at her parent's place and she takes care of her baby whole day. After 3 years, husband comes back and offers to take her back. However he seems not interested in taking responsibility of the kid. Her parents again bundle her up with him and keep the kid with them. They are happy now that their girl is 'accepted' by her husband but completely ignore the pitiable mental condition of the girl who was estranged from her 3 year old.
I am not reading out any newspaper to you. I know all these families and couple of them are even so-called 'well educated'. They stay in this millennium city in up market areas. But how that education or their residential location does make any difference to their Neanderthal mindset and thought process. The XX chromosome is always unwelcome in their families. They want the wholesome control on the women folk of their life. This baton of control is passed on to another man by the institution called 'marriage'. Since childhood she is conditioned to surrender her lever of control to the man of her life...it can be grandfather, father, brother, husband,FIL, BIL, son. Independent thinking, decision making, taking control of her own life are considered a sin for her. Her conditioning make her believe that she is ought to be treated this way and thus even a women also reinforces this biased fact to her children.
While the hate groups of Amir Khan increases manifold after he took up to discuss sensitive topics through 'Satyamev Jayate', can we still choose to behave like 'ostriches in storm'. Amir is not showing something new or bizarre, these are naked truth which lies beneath the various layers of our society. As an individual, we can stand against any discrimination by passing on the right mindset to at least one person or make a difference to at least one life around us. I start this trend by bringing up my daughter with right attitude and groom her to become an independent individual devoid of any gender stereotype...What about you??
Looking forward for that day when all "Darlings of Venus" would also become "Darlings of Earth" in true sense :-D
P.S. This is my first post in DOV :-)
11 comments:
i absolutely agree with you..it is very important that we as women install all these iron-values in our daughters.
a silent sufferer of a crime is herself no less a criminal.
and yes i am going to instill those values in my daughter as well. :):)
welcome to DOV !!
cheers!!
This is appalling. In today's day and age, these things still happen.
Congratulations on your first post here. Yes, the naked, ugly truth of India. No matter how many reality shows we watch/make, how many articles we write, how many protests and rallies we carry out, unless the mentality of the people is changed, unless it is drilled into their minds, nothing is going to change the situation. Each and every one of us need to take a stand against 'anti-girl' psychology.
Firstly, welcome to DoV! ☺
And awesome post! This is definitely and unfortunately a problem running through India, and there's no one to blame either. People are brainwashed into the thoughts of society, however, that can change, if, as you said, we make our women stronger!
A really awesome and heart-warming post... welcome to DOV :)
@meoww: Yeah..that is the least we can do...Thanx
@Ash: Even I was horrified when I heard them...but unfortunately they are true :-(
@Nihareeka: Thanx a lot..truly said...without changing the mindset nothing can be done...no law, article or movement would do
@Kiara: Thanx a lot for liking the post :-)
@Raumali: Tanx aton..glad that you liked it :-)
the last line makes a great sense NB :) great post!
Its so true that all these shows/articles or the like efforts are futile unless n until we instill these values in the minds of coming generations.
Its important to bring up the daughters with such values so that they become independent, but its equally important to groom the sons as well so that such differences do not sprout later in their minds.
@Scribby: Loved that you appreciated it :-D
@My Lair: True...Not only girls but right parenting of boys also is an integral part if we want the mindset of coming generation to change :-)
Thought provoking indeed.. Why do we take a step forward and 2 steps back every time....
Yes, as mothers we need to instill the right values in our sons and daughters..
@Sunitha...Agree with You :-)
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