Workplace flirting has become such a common thing. Honey, Darling,
Sweety are words that are just casually thrown across towards women
by men who have been just acquaintances for a couple of months. And
everyone acts as if this is normal. When some people don’t like
such flirting, they are labeled as un-evolved, orthodox and
incompatible to the socializing lifestyle of this century.
Most people might think of it as a friendly gesture and might be okay
with it. That is none of my business. When people like me are ready
to accept that there exist people who are okay with even overboard
flirting, why can’t you just accept that there are people who
don’t like it. Why are we labeled rude when I humbly express my
opinion that I don’t like to be called by names other than mine. I
have a name for a reason!
The thing that frustrates me the most is testing the depths by trying
out one or two endearing addressing. It is a very cheap shot, I would
say. For the sake of professionalism or politeness or fear or
whatever, if the girl chooses to ignore it, the guy continues it
until the girl is pushed to a place where she ‘has to’ react
strongly. Why is this necessary? If this happens in reverse, i.e., if a girl flirts first, I 've heard many guys calling her a woman of
a totally disgraceful class.
I know that no amount of ranting or yelling my heart out is going to
change this. But I simply won’t go along. I hear people saying ‘Women
need to face these situations all the time’. I agree. But why
should I face it silently and undergo awkward situations without
telling what I feel? Why should I take it in my face? Why shouldn't I just throw it back to where it came from? I'll not accept reasons
like ‘You have to work with the guy for the next year or so. If you
react to this, it would just be awkward and affect your working
environment’ or ‘Hey, this is just so common - you are
over-reacting’ or ‘He might have meant it in an innocent way’
or ‘You might be perceived as the kadoos who is unapproachable’.
No, I will not take any reasons. Some even go to the extents to say
that ‘Guys are like that and it is their instinct’. If that is
your explanation, Giving back a nice punch in your face is my
instinct and I will do it.
My question is simple. I have come to office to work, just like you.
Neither do I know you from Adam nor do you know me. I am just being
a friendly colleague. And you know that I am engaged to the guy I love.
You know I am not interested in anything beyond a professional
relation in the workplace with all my colleagues. Then why do you
have the incessant need to hit on me? Testing my depths huh? Whether
I am wavering or whether I am good enough for passing your idle time?
I am not generalizing guys here nor am I saying that girls are all
good when it comes to this. I am not judging anyone here. I am just
saying that this is happening. And often to
women. That’s all. If both the people involved are comfortable
doing the flirting for god-knows-what, go ahead - I am least
bothered. Just don’t cross people who don’t want a part of it and ruffle our feathers. We keep our cool for our own sake.
If you put one toe beyond the line, you will get what you deserve.
What’s with the need to objectify women always? When there is a
crime against women, the focus gets shifted from the fact that the
crime was committed to the fact that the woman in concern has dressed
provocatively or was out at late night. I'd like to agree that it
would do women to err on the side of caution, but why is that even a
factor? Are you an animal driven by hormone binge sans rational
thinking? Why can’t you just let us be?
I have all the questions and no answers!
Until later,
Keirthana :)
