Monsoon Memories - A Thunderstorm Saga

"Sunus , it has come . Finally..". Her eyes were shining in excitement.
I looked up from my book and smiled
"Perfect. And it is friday too".
"Did you ask if it is available?" I asked a slightly doubtful now.
"It is bound to be. If we don't get it today , some one else will and we won't get it for a week."
"Let's go now then. ". I said , discarding myFamous Five on the wicker chair in porch.

Thunder rumbled in the distance.
"Amma , I'm going out with Deeps. We will be back soon. ".
"Don't get wet." she called out . "It looks like a thunderstorm is on its way."
"Don't worry Amma , we 'll be back in no time.". I called out already getting ready.

We looked for our black umbrellas , but could only find one. The other remained stubbornly out of sight. "Fine , let's just go with one then." I said as I put on my verlon sandals. We started walking. An exhilarating cool breeze was blowing . The rain had left the ground with the an aroma of freshness that made me happy.We walked faster than usual , taking the shortest route possible to reach our destination. We made it just in time before the shop closed.

"I was about to close the store , but here it is in a plastic bag , take good care as it is the only copy I have."  He said as he pulled down the shutters and got on his bike to go home before the rain started.

As soon as we started on our way back , it started drizzling. Suddenly with the sound of exploding fireworks, thunder boomed , and a streak of lightening seemed to hit a tree  nearby. Rain was falling by the buckets and the roads were flooding. Walking through puddles and water filled potholes, our return journey was slow. And then the wind decided to play naughty and take our umbrella away. Now completely wet , we tried to chased down the umbrella which had become upside down and was collecting water inside like a huge bowl. Deeps covered the plastic bag with her dupatta while I chased the umbrella that the wind was moving away from us.

"Got it . "I said as I caught up with the flying umbrella and desparately tried to put it  back in shape. We were almost home now. "Let us make a run for it , We are wet anyway". She said , and I agreed.

Photo Courtsey (http://www.kerala-holidays-and-hotels.com/images/Kerala-Monsoon.jpg)

We dashed down the mud road into our houses completely drenched right into my Amma and Valiyamma (aunt) who immediately started scolding us for our escapade in the rain. But we knew that no scolding could take away the happiness of the possession in the plastic bag that
we had jealously guarded. " Let's go change into something dry first .We'll watch it when the rain stops. " Deeps said. Her words were drowned by the bang of the next thunder bolt . Electric sparks flew from the electric post nearby and then all went dark. "The transformer was hit. It will probably be a day before it gets repaired and power is restored."  Our hearts sank as we heard this oft heard proclamation from my uncle who had gone out with his torch to investigate.

 We looked sadly at each other. For all the trouble we had gone to get the Video Cassette of Baazigar , we wouldn't be able to watch it after all..

In the candlelight , we sat on the verandah , staring at the dark moonless sky playing Antakshari as there was nothing else to do.

"Oh Mera ...Baazigar O.. Baazigar Tu hai Bada Jadugar". I sang  ."Your turn , sing with Ja".

N.B : This post tried to picture a typical monsoon incident in my childhood.  While all of it may not have happened in one single incident , it happend some time and chasing umbrellas , getting wet in thunderstorms , and playing Antakshari during power outages were part of my childhood monsoon memories in Kerala. Hope you like it.

In a Petri Dish - A Sci-Fi Twist

If the world was really about to end , it might very well have done so already. Here's my take. This write is totally fiction and any I categorically deny any involvement with Aliens or even Mayans or Mad scientists for that matter.

Amber was walking aimlessly along a narrow winding path to a beach. There had been nothing other than discussions of armageddon and world end all day. She was tired of it all. What if the world ended ? Would she really care?  Should she confess her love to him? Now , that's stupid. What if I told him and the world did not end and he ridiculed her? That would be the end. It really would..

Samuel suddenly realized he was not reading a word of the book in front of him. His thoughts had wandered off in a tangent from when he read that word 'Amber' scribbled across the page footer. May be he should put an end to her suspense. He thought of how he had tormented her , kept her waiting ,secretly rejoicing in the fact that she loved him. He didn't for a moment believe in the rumours of world ending. That was just another myth about to be broken . He tried to call her on her cell phone and got her voice message instead.
The phone connections are bad in Hawaii. He thought wryly.  A television alert suddenly caught his attention.

Adam was working at his usual shift in the meteorological department. They had seen a whole lot of weird things going on this past week . Flash floods, Tsunamis , Torrential rains, large blocks of ice floating around in oceans. Enough and more for a panic reaction if the public came to know. But he wasn't sure if all these were some weird climatic aberration that would go away (may be not without claiming thousands of lives) , but not by ending this world either.

Shekar  was working on a top secret mission at NASA. It needed only one more approval. The space craft was all ready to take off into the outer space. At the first sign of catastrophe , it would take off , orbit the solar system . The name on the space shuttle read 'Noah's ark'.

In another dimension,  two scientists in lab coats were watching the clock. It could be called a clock only in the sense it showed a measure of time. Other than that it was another piece of sophisticated lab equipment. One of them looked into the microscope and sighed,
"You know , there is a panic reaction down there. "
"Yeah , this was bound to happen when we experiment with intelligent beings. "

"Is it time yet?"
"On count of  three ", said the other. 

On count of three the experiment container was destroyed.

"Too bad this one got itself into this state and couldn't be repaired. It will take millions of years to get one half as good. "
"Not if the Noah's Ark makes it to the new culture.I'm 99.9% sure it would ".
"That was brilliant".
The  two men exchanged smiles and  walked out of the laboratory.

Darlings from Fiction

Here is a list of my all time favourite women from fiction.I have read and re-read these books time and again , going through their trials and tribulations and happiness every time . It is not a top ten because each character has a part of me and is dear to me in a special way.

Scarlett O' Hara -Gone with the Wind -Margaret Mitchell

Practical, Cunning, Scheming, with the most earthy never say die attitude. She is optimism personified with the ability to say "Tomorrow is another day" when adversity is smiling at her from all sides. The vow she makes to "Never stay hungry again" makes you love her in spite of all her  flaws. Just a small introduction to one of the most famous women characters of all times.

Laura Castellano- Doctors -Erich Segal

Extremely beautiful, superbly talented , yet insecure and never really realizing her true worth until she meets the right man in her life. Somehow it is this insecurity that makes her so endearing to me. And every time I read the part where she says "Nothing's Up, everything is down." I can feel tears in my eyes.

Elizabeth Bennet- Pride and Prejudice -Jane Austen

Prudent, Intelligent and sensible would be the words to describe Jane Austen's most famous heroine. But Elizabeth is all this and more. Though she represents an era where women were brought up with the sole objective of hunting for a rich husband, her situation is identifiable with the contemporary Indian society that considers the marriage of its girls as the parents' primary duty. Her pride , and her natural prejudice towards a rich arrogant man, her inner turmoil as the man she hated turns out to be the one to help.. All this make her a living breathing woman rather than just a character.

Sarah Crewe- A little Princess -Frances Hodgsen Burnett

Who cannot but love the sweet and angelic Sarah Crewe who bears all her sorrow in un-complaining silence even when her situation changes over night from that of a parlour boarder (special student) to that of a maid. And I feel happy for this little Cinderella every time I read about the magic that makes things happy for her once again.

Jo March -Little Women -Louisa May Alcott

Tom -boyish, with a flair for the pen. That is Jo March for you. But that is not all. Despite her wild nature and her unsuccessful attempts at being lady like, she is a most sensitive person. Loving , and caring and feminine in a totally different way.

Tracy Whitney -If Tomorrow Comes -Sidney Sheldon

If you have seen 22 Female Kottayam /Ek Haseena thi and similar movies, and admired the heroine, rest assured you will love her . For she is their fore -runner, the inspiration  and the original avenging angel. Beautiful and Brilliant like all of Sidney Sheldon's heroines, she is more than a few notches above all of the rest because of her pluck in times of adversity that rasies her from the ashes like a Phoenix from fire. She is truly what dreams are made of.

Hermione Granger - The Harry Potter Series- J. K. Rowling

She knows everything and she can apply her knowledge. It is safe to say that without the help of the brilliant girl ,the most famous boy wizard of all times could never have achieved his destiny. More than her brains , her love for her friends and the ultimate sacrifice that she makes to erase herself from  the memory of her parents to keep them safe, endear her to me.

Durga -Pather Panchali -Bibhuti Bhushan Banerjee

Tied to a childhood in abject poverty , for no fault of hers. She represents the flickering innocence in children even when poverty tries to snuff it out at an early age. The earthy and childlike Durga who guards her possessions like a tigress till she succumbs to starvation., can bring tears to my eyes after every read.

Thethi (Devaki Manambilly) - Agnisakshi -Lalitambika Antharjanam

A character from Malayalam literature.I'm sure she would not be on most people's list. But to me she is special because , her life symbolizes what my life would have been like a century or may be even half a century ago. Her courage to stand up against a society that shuns her, the trials of a free spirit chained to the whims of an archaic society oblivious of the changing world and the ills within itself.
The story that inspired a thousand women to come forward during those tough times.

Maya -

She is the elusive protagonist that keeps coming back to my mind though I can remember neither the book nor the author. Maya is just an ordinary girl, in an ordinary Indian family that considers the marriage of its daughters as the sole purpose of its existence.When arranged marriages f her sisters fail , her strength helps her face life in her own way.

Hope you enjoy it.. :). Happy reading..

The thin line between slim and plump

A long time ago, I read or heard in one of Arundhati Roy's opinions , that being thin and dark is the biggest sin a girl in Kerala could do. And that is to date the only thing I agree with her on. When you are a baby and you are not plump, it is your parents who get the blame , and once you reach that contentious age of puberty, it becomes  your family's , your extended family's , your neighbor's and any random relative who you meet at a wedding's  primary concern.

In spite of having a healthy weight all through my adolescent period, I was extremely thin and hence was usually greeted by people at any function with the same "You have become so thin. In fact , much thinner than the last time I saw you.Are you not eating anything?" This would be followed by an accusing look at my mother and some equally unscientific nonsense like being plump is essential for an easy pregnancy .

I was inwardly happy at being thin , and rejoiced whenever I saw how the plump daughters of the above mentioned  advisers struggled to look good in any dress other than Salwar Kameez and Saree. Secretly I imagined that they might be jealous of my slim figure. At some point , I got married and that was when I realized that if being thin and single was bad , being thin and married was sacrilege- the general idea being that good cooking and happy life are symbolized by bride becoming fat after the wedding. Being busy professionals with little time for cooking did little to help my cause and I remained as thin as ever.

Then I became pregnant, and for the first time in my life , I did not care about my figure or my size . I followed my body's whims and happily put on 25kg of weight and gave birth to a healthy baby. Once the baby was out , I did not want to remain that way, but the food and the Ayurveda medicines prevalent in post-natal care invariably made you look like an over sized pillow and worst of all, the people in my hometown were beginning to look at me with approving eyes. But soon I saw the other side of the misery-that of being fat. The same people started greeting me with "Oh !you have put on weight. Now you are just right.Don't put on any more" . This was just the politest way of telling you that you are putting on weight and for the first time in my life , I understood what it felt like to be really fat.

This was a wake up call, and once back in routine, I tried my best to get back in shape . A reality check told me that S and XS days are history. But then , I console myself that an M isn't bad .I have decided to stick to the M and stay there. I do not want to be one of those plump middle aged ladies with a pot belly that sticks out of their Saree who look twice their real age. Looking at them , I see a future that I dread. I have no idea if I will ever become huge again.. I want to stay small , (at least medium) and healthy as long as I can. But I also do not want to be obsessed with my weight in such a manner as to spend my whole life eating salads.  It is a thin line, but I'm game to walk on it because size matters to me.

Shoe Laces and The Men in my Life

[From:http://findingsun.wordpress.com/tag/hearts/]

My shoelaces are undone
Cried the little girl
The school bus is at the stop
And I have got to rush
Putting away his news paper
He placed her on his lap
Let me tie them for you
Lest you slip and fall

Little Brother don't run,
Your shoe laces are undone
I can tie it for you
Or ask Daddy to come
Don't trip on shoe laces
And hurt your little knees.
My dear sweet brother,
That is just not fun.

Your shoe lace has a double knot
And your fingers are cold
Let me untie them for you
And help your cold feet warm
A smile she gave that said more
than a thousand words could say
As his hands moved up her feet
 In such a loving way

Little one, come to me
Your shoe lace is undone,
Let me tie them for you
Lest you slip and fall
With a mischievous smile he runs away
Asking me to chase
Thud, Thud, I rush to see
And take him off with me.

PS: Just a unique way to thank the men in my life (Dad , Brother , Hubby and Son).
Belated  Valentine's Day Wishes, Darlings!

When I made my Daddy Happy

I was playing with my  Thomas and Friends train set when I saw Daddy reading that book. I was immediately interested. It had a picture of a laptop on it . I loved laptops . Ever since I could remember which wasn't really much, since I had been born only 3 years ago. But I had been fascinated enough by it to take out keys, try feed it corn flakes and even pull out a CD drive . Now I know it is something that needs to be handled with care. I can watch you tube videos all by myself. (swells with pride).

Source

That book looks like it is full of laptop pictures. I decided to  employ my usual methods of coercion to wheedle the book out of his hands. I wailed and I howled . Daddy just walked away into a different room to read. I decided to pester him until I got what I wanted. Little babies like me always had their way. "I wanna book....". I wailed again. Mama came and lifted me off my feet. I wailed louder. "I wanna book". Finally Dad got tired of it and kept the book with a bang in front of me and walked away in a huff. I  got what I wanted. I quickly grabbed the book. But suddenly ,it wasn't fun anymore. I  looked around hoping to flash  my victorious smile , but Daddy had gone off somewhere.

 

 

I went to look for him. I found him in the bedroom lying down on the bed . Realization struck me. I understood. I lie down on the bed by myself when I'm sad . I had made Daddy sad by taking the book all for myself . I felt sad too. I wanted that book badly , but I wanted Daddy to be happy too. I looked at the book and then at Daddy. Then I made my decision. I quietly kept the book near Daddy and walked back looking for Mama. I ran into her arms and wept my heart out. Then I felt a kiss on my tear stained cheek, and the rugged feel of an unshaven face .I out stretched my arms and jumped to hug my Daddy. He was smiling at  me and telling Mama how proud he was of me. That I had given up something I really really wanted to make some one else I cared about happy. That I would grow up a fine man.

The world was alright again as Daddy placed me on his lap and we looked at the laptop pictures in the book together.

P.S : Giving is not an art. It comes straight from your heart. This story would be my son's take on the topic :)

Vindicated..

He walked slowly to the bus stop, treading carefully over the inches of snow that had accumulated all around him.Damn winter. "This Winter had been a grouchy old man with no sense of humour. He had just dumped 10 inches of snow on my driveway that I had worked so hard to clean yesterday." He thought angrily.He looked back at the empty house and stifled the loneliness that was creeping into his heart.


Heart..His wounded,sutured, weak heart. He often wondered that it still pumped blood after all that it had gone through.

He covered his face with his gloved hand to protect himself from the cold wind that was blowing as he waited for the bus to show up.He thought his plans over. First of all, he needed a drink and some Italian food. Yesterday's bus driver had told him of a nice Italian family restaurant in this route that he wanted to try.

"I need to get down at the Italian restaurant near Normandale Lake .". He told the driver who was a nice lady who agreed to help him find the right place to get down. Normally, he would have made an effort at pleasant conversation , but lately, he always felt weak. Increasingly conversations had become time- fillers with little purpose and even less meaning.He even ignored the amused smiles of co-passengers as he misheard Computer Ave as Suture ave .His hearing hadn't been the same after the surgery. Who was he kidding, nothing was the same anymore. His thoughts re winded themselves into the past and he dozed off exhausted.

It was already dark when he got out of the bus. It was only a short walk. But out of sheer habit, he checked his pocket for his gun.It was there and he felt safe.He had promised himself that he would never be caught unawares. Never again.

He walked into the restaurant and was struck by a wave of nostalgia.It was a small family run place with lots of food and drinks and fun.There weren't any customers yet and the place looked empty.

As he slowly sipped his drink, the sadness and loneliness that he had been trying to bury resurfaced , like it always did, after a few drinks.But now,it seemed more bearable like the bitter sweet taste of tears unlike the blinding pain that would often come to him when he was sober.He could accept that he was all alone in this world.That he did not belong here any more. That he had no purpose on this earth. Nobody waited for him. If he died just now, nobody would miss him. But may be somebody would be waiting for him up there.. He looked out of the glass window into the star studded skies that seemed to be calling out to him.

He was startled into reality by a harsh voice and the screams of people. There was a man with a gun . "It is a hold up.Give me all you have or I'll shoot you". The guy with the gun was holding it straight to the cashier's forehead". The lady behind the counter was screaming and the restaurant owner was pleading "Please don't shoot my son . I'll do anything you say.Please..."

Suddenly a shot ran out. The gun-man had fallen down in a pool of blood. Some one called 911.There was a crowd near the counter now.

He slowly put the gun back into his pocket and walked out of the door oblivious of the family that was thanking him, oblivious of the blaring police sirens and ambulance and oblivious to the people watching . For the first time in ten years he felt at peace. Vindicated.

If only there was someone to do what he did tonight on that fateful day when three of them walked into his restaurant, killed his family and left him for dead.He looked at the sky and felt that the stars were shining down on him.

N.B :Dedicated to the old man I saw in the bus , whose story it partly is.

In the Path of Thorns

When this month's discussion topic was announced  and Maithili implored all of us to come out with our experience,I was sure that there would not be many entries.But was shocked beyond belief to read the revelations from my friends at DOV and after reading what each of them shared , my respect for these amazing ladies have increased a hundred fold.

An age old saying in my language goes like this "immaterial of whether a leaf falls on a thorn or the thorn falls on a leaf,the leaf gets damaged ". And from the moment a girl child is born ,these cliched lines are oft repeated to the parents and the girl alike.That being said,every girl at some point gets her share of prickly sex repressed male thorns.

Being in a close knit family with grand parents,uncles , aunts and cousins living almost on the same compound to look after me and by God's grace, I haven't had to encounter such bastards in my life.But just as a leaf on a rose bush cannot escape grazing through the thorns to fly in the wind, I too have fleeting memories of nameless and faceless parasites that refuse to go away that must be the part of memories of even the most ordinary Indian girl.

1)The hairy hand that made into my purple frock when I was standing in queue for darshan at one of the most famous temples in Kerala and how I with all my might pushed it back and somehow exchanged position with a fat old lady in front of me.

2)The pointed fingers that kept poking me through the gap between the seat and the back rest in the TNSRTC bus while the teacher was taking me and a friend for a science camp in Tamil Nadu. the frustration when the teacher asked us to ignore the constant pokes and the my friend's fiery outburst at the guy which finally resulted in him moving to a different seat.


3)The numerous times I have had to ask my friends (guys) or cousins to exchange seats with me at a movie theater because some dark hands were trying to grope me in the safe darkness of the movie hall.


4)The lecherous eyes of the random guy who stopped me mid road to ask if I wear clothes when I take bath (!!!!).

5)Those decently dressed men in the heavily crowded trains and buses , whose only aim in life is to bump on to you with each movement the vehicle makes and then look back with a false smile as if it was an accident.

6)The showmen who post themselves at strategic locations near girls hostels and embarrass the girls by showing off their strategic body areas.

7)The hands that always try to find their way towards a girl when you are sleeping in a second class sleeper compartment and how you always remembered to sleep with your feet in the direction of the corridor and keep them covered under a blanket.

8)The fake sleeping guy who tries to fall asleep on your shoulders as if by some horrible quirk of  fate you did not get a lady's seat in one of those overpriced overnight Volvo buses.

With time and experience , I learned that this was the way of life and there was nothing much a woman could do to avoid such people completely (unless of course I wanted to shut myself off in a nunnery, which after some second thoughts involving Sister Abhaya might not be that safe either )

But some of my favorite weapons that helped me are an umbrella and a safety pin. Of course having a fierce look helps and some martial arts would be amazing.

Here are a few small tips to stay safe in daily life , which I used to follow

1)The open umbrella is a savior while walking through crowded foot paths , in that it gives you a  little space and a much needed weapon from guys whose only intent is to bump you and touch your breast.

2) A closed umbrella is a good weapon to use against auto  or taxi drivers if you feel they are planning something for you. (Have always been told this , but haven't had to use it personally).

3)Safety pin is a good weapon to be used when the perpetrator is hiding in a crowded or dark place, like a bus or movie theater.I have successfully used it on the guy who tried to poke me in
the movie theater .(3 pricks and 20 min later that guy left the theater). Compass or other sharp instruments can be used too but for the difficulty of carrying it around.

4)Having one or more trusted people of the stronger sex , unfortunately is one of the most fool proof ways to keep yourself safe.

Miss-Coded

I studied in a co-ed school where boys outnumbered girls 3:1 and  while it might seem like an ideal situation for getting boy friends, life wasn't so simple back then and was fraught with more complications than that could be fathomed by the average girls school going girl.

While the latter could happily come to terms with her sexuality and discuss it openly in the class rooms,  for us , every aspect of femininity was something to be secretively and protectively hidden from the curious eyes of our opp sex adolescent classmates. Thus evolved a series of codes to communicate precarious situations like "bra strap showing" (Is it new), "my period started" (My uncle came for a visit), "You need to check your back" (Did you fall down?) etc .

These seemingly innocent codes saved us from openly discussing such issues in full public glare , though I'm  sure the smart ones would have guessed the connections pretty soon. But these code words for the most part helped us maintain dignity and decorum in the class rooms.But these also lead to some really funny incidents when one or the other of these codes threw up red herrings.

Scene 1: Students were engrossed in their work at the physics lab. Some girls were bending over looking at the simple pendulum. Some boys were trying to get the refractive indexes through the glass boxes. some others were wasting time watching other studious people try to prove that g is actually 9.8 or atleast somewhere close. 
A squeaky voiced boy shouted out looking at the girls "Is it new? ". Automatically all the girls in the vicinity stopped dead at what they are doing and adjusted bra straps. Only to later find out that he was referring to a shiny new glass slab.

Scene 2 :Lunch break and every one is looking for Girl (xyz). Boy (abc) with whom she was last seen with is questioned by other girls.
ABC :She left for home a while ago. Her uncle came it seems.
Girls look at each other with a collective look of empathy and pity.
ABC (totally confused). What's wrong? Lucky xyz .Her cousins have come too. The whole family are going to Vegaland today and had come to pick her up.

That was the day we decided we need more imaginative codes. :)

Tangled Web

This was one of my poems written back in 2007 , While I was wondering what my first post to Darlings of Venus should be , I came across this one and thought I'd share and that image something I used as a back ground design for the poem back then.

A tangled web
I've made my life
I'm caught in it
And stuck for life

Why did I lie
When I did love
I wanted to tell you
But knew not how

And I wove the yarn
that I show the world
Like I didn't know
The truth would unfold

When we had promised
To be true all the way
Why did I break it
When I had my say

When we had promised
to be true all the way
Why did I break it
When I had my way

I wished to talk
to make amends
Coz I really wanted
For us to be friends

How ever hard
I try to change
Sometimes I still
Don't act my age

But what ever I said
That's only half true
Was coz I was scared
Of losing you