January 14, 2012

Yes or No....!

Posted by Smita at 6:14 PM
Yes Yes Yes.
Yes, the answer to the question is a big Yes.

The question : Whether to keep or not the gifts or things gifted by your ex-girlfriends/boyfriends.
The answer   : Yes.

The dilemma keeps on striking each-day, everyday from inside. The question, as to keep the memories or discard them away keep bugging you from inside every-time you come across them. What to do and what not to do! Whom to tell and whom not to tell! Keep it ? Throw it?

Love Quotes

You don't love him/her anymore, you don't think or care about that person anymore but still you have his/her memories with you. You still carry the wallet gifted by her, you still put on the perfume gifted by him, you still have the soft toy gifted by her on your table, you still wear the ear-rings gifted by him,you still read the book she had gifted you once and you still use the key-chain that he had got for you.
You don't care about that person anymore with that earlier intensity. You don't wish to know about the whereabouts of that person anymore. You don't want him/her anymore in your life. You are done with that person but still you carry his/her memories with you.

 One of my friends showed me his ex-girlfriends ear-rings and bracelet that he carries with himself to till date. They broke up some 2-3 years back.The guy had secretly kept those things of hers and keeps it with him every-time. Once in conversation with him,the question aroused, should he keep them?
Answer is, Yes.

Though it's my perspective about the scenario and I would gladly like to be corrected if I am wrong.
Why does one has to throw away the things gifted by their ex's? Why? You loved that person once, right? You were madly and irrevocably in love with that soul. For you he/she meant the whole world. You would have done anything just to make him/her happy. You cared from your heart for that person, right? You never left a chance to make memorable memories with that person. You would have brought the whole world at his/her feet if he/she would have asked you to do so. You had once waited for all the things gifted to you, you accepted them with much happiness once, right? So now why even the thought of throwing them away?

Throw them if you have been in a bad relationship, if you just couldn't connect any good memories with them. But then also, try looking at the brighter side, and believe me, there's always one in every thing. You just have to look a bit harder to find the brighter one. A s the darker part always try shadowing the brighter part.

Throw away the gifts, cards and stuff if you hate that person for some or the other reason now. Discard them all if you don't want to recall that person's memories in your life anymore. Erase all his/her footprints from your life and surroundings if they make you suffer. But then, does being in Love with somebody made you suffer? If yes, then you were fooled for being infatuated and you thought it was Love! You were in Love but the other was just playing!

 I, personally would like to suggest to keep the memories with you if you have that mental level that you can control your foolish inner-self from being hurt every-time by seeing those things.
I would like to suggest him to keep all the stuff he has of her ex-girlfriend if doesn't hates her. Keep them. Keep the memories. See it and feel the aroma of love for somebody else if not for her. Don't see it as something bad, reminding you of the bad phase you had with the person to whom those things belong to. See that as somebody whom once loved you and cared for you and had got some of her love and care for you in the form of that gift. Take it as a token of your Love, the real reason why you kept it, the real reason behind still keeping it. Mark it as a symbol of Love you once felt or still feel for somebody.
Keep the ear-rings, keep the bracelet. See it as a token of love. Don't see it as her if you don't want to.Keep it for life or pass it on to somebody you would Love in future,if that person can understand the value of those articles. Keeping such things is in itself a big deal. Not everybody does that. You did that because you felt something and maybe you still do. 

 I still have the photo of somebody I loved. I won't delete it however coming across it does hurts me. But the thing I shared with him once was pure and real from my side. And no matter what the outcome of that thing was, what all consequences I and he bore because of that, I still Love to remember sometimes that somebody did really cared for me once. Though his existence doesn't bothers me anymore but still I don't feel like deleting his photo, that I have with me with him still ignorant of this fact. He too might be having something of me, if he really cared. So this is not bad. This not something to hide, though revealing also should be avoided to all. This is the your true spirit celebrating your true Love, even when the other person ditched it!
Attaching yourself to somebody's inanimate object like a snap together, a gift or any such thing is no foolishness. It shows how much you were into that other person. It's the feelings that are attached. It's the unsaid words that matters. It's the bond that you shared with somebody that is binding you with that thing. It's no bad to keep it. Keep it and cherish it. Make new memories with it rather than remembering the old ones. Life is about moving on. Keep walking and keep smiling, this should be the attitude. 

Many will come and many shall leave but dearer are the ones whose memories shall never leave.



Aatish Sharma on January 14, 2012 at 10:32 PM said...

i totally agree.!
keep the gifts received from our ex, for the old time's sake, for the good memories shared :)

nice post

Keirthana on January 15, 2012 at 8:35 PM said...

A really different take on a different topic. I can agree with you, but sometimes people do not have the mental maturity to look at them as lovable memories and get on with life. They get hurt. The current partners get jealous and such stuff upsets the present life.

So as you said, if the persons involved can really carry it off with maturity, they can keep the gifts.

Nice one Smita :)

Mystical Skeptical Me on January 16, 2012 at 10:21 PM said...

Different view point. I personally would delete the gifts but keep the memories.

I liked the way you have reasoned Smita :D :) Seriously. :D

simmi on January 18, 2012 at 4:33 PM said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Smita on January 18, 2012 at 4:35 PM said...

Aatish Sharma : exactly my point! keep the memories, the spirit alive. Keep love intact! :)

Keirthana : Yes, I totally understand your point. If your partner or you yourself are not comfortable with keeping those gifts and all then it's better to discard them.
Why keep things which hurt you :) :)

Mystical Skeptical Me : thanks :) I tried reasoning on a practical note thought the love note empowered the practical note here I feel :P :P

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