Happy New Year !

You gave her your trust

There she was as a blogger here

Acknowledging the talent

With ideas well served.

The platform grew 

Darling of Venus was growing

You started it

Many others joined in it's showcasing.

Together we came as one

One platform for all the Darlings

Voicing our opinions 

on matters adjoining!

Thanksgiving for us is here

Congratulating you for your new journey.

Embrace a new life soon 

with all the happiness and prosperity.

P.S.: Here's wishing Maithili, person who laid the building brick for Darling of Venus, a very happy married life. Darlings it's showtime!

Smita

Let the world end..

              At the beginning of this month, when I put out the topic for the month, I had a plan in mind. I do not know if the world will end anytime soon but I would like to be prepared to face it. No regrets, no unspoken words, no hard feelings and surrender to the mystic fate.
             My average day consisted of

• Getting up and hurrying through the morning routine and rush to the college.
• Sit through the lectures, stand through the practicals
• Rush to catch the train back home
• Come home and sit in front of the laptop
• Have dinner and sleep

           In between, the only thought that weighed on my mind was "What do I eat?"

           It's tough to make a choice when the tongue and waist run in the opposite direction. Where every yielding to tongue invites widening waistline. 

           My routine was pretty much mediocre and yet it left me little space to breath. To do what gives me happiness. To have enough energy left to do anything than sit in front of the laptop! 

           The last month of this year, I dedicated to myself :P 

           I joined the library again. I shop more often. I give more time to matching my clothes with my hair clip :P 

           

       So this month my day consists of:

• Getting up a little later than before and doing stuff at leisure..
• Getting into the bus and listening to music
• Reading my book in train
• Reaching college half an hour early and chitchatting 
• Sitting through lectures and standing through practicals (cant change this :P)
• Coming home and watching Grey's anatomy
• Checking on mails and reading blogs
• Dinner
• A walk alone in the night :P Singing aloud the songs playing on the radio :P
• Going home and getting the clothes and bag ready for the next day ( that's how I wake up late and still reach college early :D :D ) 

      Besides I made a pact that I will eat all my favorite food by 21st Dec :P So I have been gratifying my taste buds and loving it :D 

     This month has been fun. 

     Meeting school friends and close buddies.

     Going out with the college gang.

     Having deep conversations about matters never talked about.

     Discovering the joy of being shouted at  by my nephew :P 

     

     On the other hand, I have heard about the gravest crimes being committed in this world which we so fear to leave. 

     A four year old girl molested and penetrated by finger by her autowala (They call it just molestation seriously???)

     A 67 year old senior citizen raped

     A 23 year old girl gang raped and left to die. 

     Women killed for administering polio vaccine.

     Children killed in school by a gunman.

     and these are just the ones that are highlighted in newspapers. What ghastly crimes might be going unreported, I dread to think.

     As I type this post, several worlds are getting destroyed. Not by the fury of nature but by the perverted minds. Suddenly the 2012 movie looks more brighter than the reality. The optimist might think that things will change. I don't. No law can work effectively in a place where a strong punishment to 99% of the guilty will be withheld because of the 1% cases which are fake. Stronger laws yes. What will you do about the 1% where people take advantage of the law and trap the innocent? 1% might be a small number and what difference will it make until that 1% contains your kin? 

    

     Yes I m ready. Let the world end. 

     

                               

Dear menKIND

               I know you have been bashed by us on several occasions in blogworld and we women have commented to keep that ire ignited :P You have been condemned ,for all the wrong you do, more often than been praised for the kind gestures. Today I want to thank all the wonderful men in my life (in no particular order)

Thank you for running behind me holding the seat of my bicycle so that I don't fall balancing it.
Just because I saw the ad of  the new "Hide and Seek" (which was not even distributed in shops then) and I craved it badly, you went from shop to shop every day after work until you finally found it!
You lost your temper more on me than on anyone else. But I am also the only one who can get anything from you. I got your spontaneous generosity and my outburst I inherited from you.

Thank you for forgiving me for being selfish. When I don't have enough patience to wait for you to eat that chocolate lying alone in the fridge ;).
Thank you for always lending me your things and letting me have it if I forget to return them :P.
For the novels you let me buy from your saved pocket money.
For obeying my word above everybody else.

Thank you for putting up with my outbursts. Bless your soul, you are the receiving end most of the time :*
For the random things you say that keep me smiling all day.
For listening to my dukh bhari kahani and my silly ideas. For the  stupid jokes we shared.
For that precious time you steal from the day  for me :)
For being the only one I can't think of what else to thank for :D :D Because everything seems so natural with you :D

Thank you for letting me do all the crazy stuff in the lab :D
For sometimes doing even my part of the experiment ;)
For leaving your work and coming to help when you see I m struggling with something.
For all the last moment jhols we do while submission.

Thank you for not loosing patience with me when I do not write enough. (FL this is you :P )
For lightening  my mood (although you don't know that)

Thank you for leaving  your seat in the bus so that I don't stand in a bus packed with men ( that random guy in the bus)

The list goes long but for now I will stop here :D

Biochemistry of Life..

            While I m most of the time whining about the long hours of college, today I got something to share with you Darlings. It is nothing you must not have heard of but yet the way it was put was novel. Atleast in a class of biochemistry it is rare to stumble upon such ideas.

            We were studying glycolysis. For layman- breakdown of glucose to obtain energy. Now this teacher of ours has a passion for teaching. He uses funny examples and analogies to make his point. He also spends a lot of time talking about life. He was done teaching us the various steps in the long chain and then the cycle called Kreb's cycle. We had learnt the enzymes, structures and mathematics of energy. At the end of it he said, " All this for just 34% energy. We get only 34% from this longggg chain of events. Could there be scope for evolution? Maybe we could use 100% someday!"

            His words made us think. Could it be possible? Are we breaking down our glucose better than our ancestors and could our successors use glucose in a better way? 

            He looked at our faces and then said, "In life everyone thinks about having a perfect life partner. The girls will have a role model. She would want her life partner to be good looking, romantic and all that her filmy hero does. The boys will have a picture of a girl in their thoughts. He will want the girl to fit in that image. But do we all end up with that kind of a person as our life partner? What does all of us ultimately want? That whoever your life partner maybe, he should be with you through all the ups and downs of life. Even if the guy goes bald his life partner should still love him. Even if the girl starts aging or growing fat , her life partner should still say "you are beautiful" even if it is a lie! Because at the end of your day, you want your life partner to be yours and to be with you always. If you go for someone superficial and one who is much much better than you, then you will someday feel that you are inferior or you will always be insecure. He might leave you for someone better looking right? 

            We were wondering what the connection was between his question and the sudden romantic discussion. 

            "There were many life forms which acted smart and went for a more efficient and shorter system to use up glucose but they couldn't stand the test of time. We evolved from a single cell. Number of cells decided to work together and went on to make tissues, organs and later organisms if I may call so. We followed this system and we survived. Eventually it was not about who did the best, it was about who managed to stay for long and we did. Not necessary that everything that looks better will last better." 

             Couldn't help marvelling and the simplicity and exactness of the answer and his comparison with life! 

Yea I know, this teacher rocks!!        

Getting to know The Darling - Interview with Maithili

Hello Hello *And a little shake up wake up* to all the Darlings of DOV!!

As DIGS was telling me a few days back, there is a general lull in the Blogosphere...and ladies, that just is not us, comeon!! Bring back the sexy, sizzling, intelligent, intriguing women out! :D Anyway, so I got this MUCH awaited opportunity to Interview our beloved Maithili...or as Suruchi christened her to be Maiths. My few of the earliest Blogger friends and also, as we call each other often, Soul Sister. Maithili spins some of the brilliant spine tingling, mush inducing, thoughtful and mature, fun and mysterious stories ever. After much resistance (from my side....SUCH a big chance, I could have screwed up easily) and never subsiding encouragement from Maithili herself, Presenting before you, a belated Birthday present for Maiths: Maithili Bhatnagar's One Such Story! 

MSM: Heyyy :D

Maiths: hi

MSM: You up for the interview?

Maiths: you have 45 minutes to interview me madam :D

MSM: :D Okay, so we start now.

Maiths: ok.

MSM: This is the most intriguing part because I have no idea what to ask you

Maiths: This is a great start! All interviews start this way :D

MSM: Heheh :D Okay then Maithili...or as we all know you, Maiths...What is your story for One Such Story?

Maiths: Well, One Such Story wasn't my first blog actually. I started with a blog when I was going through a very low phase and then slowly I began writing more about fiction. That's when I thought of starting a new blog dedicated to fiction.

MSM: Is your first blog still up?

Maiths: No it isn't. It was relevant in the situations I was in at that time but now I’m in a much better phase *touchwood* and I do not go want to relive those moments.

MSM: You have moved on. Very well :) Which brings me to this question....when you write stories, what inspires you...?

Maiths: Tag line of my blog - Each one of us is a story.That is what inspires me to write. Writing a story needs no talent at all. We all are story tellers. Right from making excuses for why we are late or covering up for our lies, we spin stories. People and everyday situations inspire me the most. Sometimes a dream can turn into an inspiration for me.

MSM: Ah, yes. I remember a Metro-Station story of yours. :) It was spooky.

Maiths: I get such spooky dreams. I do not know if they are prophetic but yes they somehow integrate into beautiful stories

MSM: They do :) Okay, so Maiths...are you a serious person or fun loving? Your stories show a very matured side of you.

Maiths: It actually depends on the situation. I’m a very situational kind of a person. I banter when I’m in a casual environment but if a situation needs seriousness then I’m serious. It’s for this reason that people who see me serious cannot associate me as being someone fun too.

MSM: Hmmm....I guess you love to laugh a lot. :D Which is one thing that makes you terribly angry?

Maiths: There are a lot of things that make me angry but it’s all associated with when someone doesn't think of another person's situation. I don't know what's the point of being human if one cannot feel for someone else?

MSM: Well said. So, do you make sure that your emotions are conveyed to the other person or you love to simmer? :D

Maiths: I make my emotions conveyed if they are pleasant ones. Life is too short for words to be left unsaid. At the same time I hold on before letting out my negative emotions. Sometimes we judge a little too harshly :)

MSM: I am impressed with your calculated judgment :D I agree with you.

You are creative as well, aren't you? We all know the fabulous mouth watering brownies you have made.

Maiths: I would like to believe I’m creative :) Brownies are too easy to make but yes those are ones I make well :)

MSM: Hehehe, easier said than done. I can not make desserts at all. :D So, Maiths, your family knows you write?

Maiths: Well they know that I write. They do not know that I blog.

MSM: Hmmmm, they would love to know how loved their daughter is in the blog world though :D

Maiths: Well I would not tell them yet as their reading my blog would make me conscious of the content I write. I’m still supposed to be a child :P

MSM: Ah true true. :D Imagine our fathers ;)

If my dad reads the love stories I spin on escorts and the other women :P Heheh.

Maiths: Exactly! They would wonder where we got the experience. :P

MSM: Haha  :D Which brings me to this Maiths, how would you define yourself in less than 5 words before we move on to rapid fire?

Maiths: Flexible, Emotional, Romantic, Lazy.

MSM: Brilliant. :D I loved the variety here.

Maiths: :D I tried covering everything :D

MSM:That's the mark of a true story-teller. :D Few Words. Entire Story!

So, you ready for the rapid fire?

Maiths: Yes. I’m all geared for the rapid fire now :D

MSM: :D Just answer in yes or no.

Maiths: Alright...karma is B***h. Red is getting her prayers answered.

MSM: :D She most certainly is.

Ever lied to get your way with things?

Maiths: Yes.

MSM: Secretly plotted to kill someone?

Maiths: No.

MSM: No? Never? :D

Maiths: As in really plotted or thought of plotting?

MSM: Thought of.

Maiths: I thought of killing my micro teacher :D

MSM: There you go! :D

Okay, ever Adam-teased?

Maiths: Hehe Yees :P *hides self*

MSM: :D :D Hi5 by the way

Maiths: hehe those were the days!! :P

MSM: I knoww ;)

Maiths: hi5 on that

MSM: Next...Believe in Ghosts?

Maiths: Yes. I know I’m supposed to be a science student and all that.. But i still believe in spirits.

MSM: Nevermind that. I am a lawyer and still believe in spirits :P Okay, so answer in short. First thing people will notice about you when they see you.

Maiths: Weight :P

MSM: Hahahahaha. :D Other than that. I know you have beautiful eyes.

Maiths: They might notice my smile (as I m told it is cute) but my eyes (my pride) are hidden by specs

MSM: Aaaah. Specs I tell you. Every woman with beautiful eyes has faced this. :D

If you were given a chance to write someone's story, a celebrity or any such person, who would you, choose?

Maiths: I have no idea :P Let me think

MSM: Take your time.

Maiths: I think Aishwarya Rai :D

MSM: Ah. And why would you say that? :D

Maiths: First, because she was from my college :P and very less is written about her..she’s been a private person actually…I would like to write on her life…how it would be to be overshadowed by father in law during her delivery :P Another candidate could be Katrina Kaif. I really have quite a respect for that lady.

MSM: Interesting. :D Aha. Tell us something about your college and what you do. Since you said Aishwarya was there. :D

Maiths: Hehe. No. Aish was an ex-student of my junior college. Right now I go to degree college and make lotions, syrups, inhalations etc and keep doing tests to check the quality of drugs :P

MSM: Pharmacology?

Maiths: That’s one of the subject.

MSM: Hmmm....We both need some. Drugs that is :D

Maiths: :D haha yea I’m perennially on some drug or the other.

MSM: Achcha, tell me something. What is one thing in a guy that turns you off?

Maiths: Hmmm. Bad manners.

MSM: And one thing that you find annoying in women.

Maiths: Once again - inconsiderate.

MSM: Hmmm...Are you a flirt?

Maiths: :P I’m not.

MSM: Seriously? :D I feel like I am spoilt now. :D Okay Maiths... You started DOV. It's an Only Girls Blog and I wouldn't be surprised if someone says women cannot be together for long. Do you agree?

Maiths: I agree that women cannot be together always. :P If they aren't lesbians!!

MSM: Hahaha!

Maiths: same goes for men!

MSM: True!

Maiths: The only difference is, men don't talk to each other when they have ego clashes, we women talk and fight when that happens.

MSM: Yea true true. DOV is your brain child. What do you feel about it now...it's reached to a very popular pedestal. :D

Maiths: The real challenge is now. Now when the novelty wears off, we need to go on stronger, more ideas, more participation and more membership should happen. Else DOV will dry up.

MSM: We wouldn't let that happen.

Maiths: What I see is that members are active for the first month after joining and then they suddenly disappear. That is what should not happen.

MSM: I am sure there needs to be a fire to be lit in our fiery blog. :D No worries, we darlings will definitely make it work.

Maiths: We have to. Agreed that the Admins have been slightly overburdened this month, but we will be soon back in action.

MSM: :D Yes. So before we conclude....tell us Maiths; Blogging world must have given you some wonderful experiences. Some Blogs you would suggest our darlings to have a look at.

Maiths: Well I believe that blogging is about what you feel and what you are. So unless you are a total copy of me (which MSM of course you are) I cannot for sure say that you will like what I liked. Some blogs like Confessions of Chocolate Obsessed and The Girl At First Avenue might appeal to those looking for Spontaneity…RedHanded for Humor, Atrocious Scribbling for Subtle Humor and Good Creative Work, MSM for the mystical feel and beautiful poetry, A Peek Into My Life for bringing energy and enthu about life, Paanipuri Lover and Abhilasha for some cheerfulness, Conversations by Sujatha Sathya for some introspection and some cute ones, Pink and Black by Sulagna for some Sweet and Mushy and her newest USP- her darling baby and the centre of her world, Suruchi, our Patakha and very creative darling :)

MSM: *Ear to Ear Grin* This is one of the most beautiful description of blogs you have given.

Maiths: :D :D

MSM: So, with this, we come to an end. I am sure Maiths you could have been interviewed better, but I loved your answers! :D

Maiths: :) it was good.

MSM: :D It was the most spontaneous conversation ever

Maiths: Thank you  MSM for interviewing me. I want to thank all the darlings for making this blog a success. Specially the first 7 members who I call the core members J If it weren’t for your involvement and interest in the blog I wouldn’t have gone ahead with this idea. Thank you PeeVee, MSM, Suruchi, Chandana, Vinati, Redhanded and Viya. I also want to wholeheartedly thank all the readers of DOV. I have made some wonderful friends and come across very talented and honest writers through this space. Thank you all for making Darlings of Venus what it is J I love you all...

PS: This was supposed to be put up on Maith's Birthday, but you know about the Murphy's Law no....whenever I tried to do that, my internet used to betray. Maiths dear had been really patient with me. 

Alright don't touch me..

My parents are working and from a very young age I was made independent and equipped to face the world. It was the way they brought me up that I never felt at loss. I knew what was happening due to their frank and correct knowledge which they gave me.

My Mummy never left me alone in the care of neighbors. She would carry me along or leave me with my grandparents. Papa never used to allow me to go to neighbors house to play.I used to feel it was unfair that I never got to play when all friends went to others houses to play.
 Mummy would also tell  me, "It is not that we have a problem with your friends or their houses, but we never know who else is there in their house. When we are not at home and you go to their house to play, they might tell you that your friend is home and invite you in. They could harm  you." I was irritated with this argument and felt they were being overprotective. I used to throw a fit and say, "Everyone goes to play at each others house, they come to ours and my friends also go to other houses. Nothing happens to them." Mummy wouldn't say anything but she wouldn't budge from her stand.. Years later I realised how wrong I was.. Things did happen to my friends..

   When I was about 9 years old, Mummy told me all about maturing and what a bad touch was. It was due to her timely teaching I can say that I grew up more mature about my surroundings than others my age. I could scrutinize situations for myself.

   

The important question after you know what a bad touch is, "Whether it was intentional or unintentional"

Incident 1

I was 10 years old and I had those chubby cheeks. I was used to people pulling my cheeks. 

One day a man from cylinder company had come to our house. My Papa went inside the kitchen to check if the connection was okay. This man was sitting close to me. He pulled my cheeks and while he was taking his hands away it sort of slipped and touched the soft bulge on my chest.. I could have told my Papa who returned in just 2 minutes but I didn't know if it was accidental or purposely done act.. Now when I think back I know for sure what it was..

Incident 2

I was returning home from my classes. There was small path and suddenly a lot of people were walking from the opposite side. A man came rushing and just dashed into me. I was shocked when I realised he managed to grope me. He clearly took advantage but I couldn't do a thing about it because he had rushed and I hadn't even seen his face.. 

Incident 3

This happened when I was in second year of Junior college. We were all giving our prelim exams and most of us were girls in that exam room. A senior professor had exam duty in the class. While most senior teachers signed the answer sheets before giving them to us, this man would first distribute the sheets and then come on a round to sign the paper. He was not from Science faculty and we were not acquainted with him or his reputation.

When he came to my desk I was busy writing my paper. In a hurry I gave him my answer sheet. He signed it and came more closer than required to return it back. He brushed his hand against me while returning it back. I was aghast and confused. Was this really an accident? In the top college of Mumbai? Was this person a pervert? How dare he take advantage of students busy writing exam? I was angry and didn't know what to do. I wasn't even sure if this had happened only to me. 

After a few more days, he again came as the supervisor in my room. This time I was prepared. While he started his rounds I saw all the girls ahead of me shifting a little away and I knew it! This man was doing it purposely to all girls. 

When he came at my desk I gave him my paper and shifted inside. I looked straight into his eyes and he dared not move any closer to me. He knew that I knew and I gave him a dirty look. 

After the paper ended I asked the other girls and each one of them thought it was a MISTAKE until they got to know that it happened with all of us. 

It was a difficult thing to prove and I knew that in a such a high profile college this things will be stashed under the carpet. To be true I was helpless because it was a college of students who were scoring above 90% and most of them wouldn't want to get into a controversy at such a time of their career. I was weak too. I accept that I too didn't feel like getting involved in such a mess. 

The least I could do was inform my juniors about this pervert and tell them to spread it to their juniors as well. Atleast they will be better informed and not be confused like our batch was.

Incident 4

I and Mummy were in a market. It was getting dark and we were going to the bus stop. A short man was walking towards us. He started getting a little closer as he was about to get past me. I had observed his change in direction. I was proved right when he was about to touch me. I grabbed his hand before he could touch me and pushed it away with a force that made him stumble. I knew the tactics too well..

Incident 5
I had gone to my school regarding some work of my younger brother who studies there. I met some of my teachers and I was on my way to the ground when I met our Physical education sir. When I was in school I never noticed or thought of him as someone who could misbehave. He was casually talking and suddenly he put his hand on my shoulder and was putting pressure. I was momentarily shocked and there were few other students there. He asked me something when I replied, "Alright, don't touch me" and took his hand away. He looked embarrassed and well, he deserved that. I didn't think if he was just being casual or was actually having mean intentions. But I was proud that I never gave him the chance to misbehave if he intended to.

I don't have any story that will talk of strength. It might be because of the timely guidance of my parents that I have the ability to sense tharkis. 
I would sound a little old fashioned if I say that one must always keep a little distance. Precaution is what we must take from such situations. I m not very bold and I know that. Its not necessary that you fight back always. It is okay if you don't have the courage to fight. But be strong to get over it, be caring enough to see that no one else suffers, be wise to educate your siblings and children about it at the right age. 


We women have really progressed a lot but nature hasn't given us the same physical strength as men. It isn't always safe to confront people who tease you. You never know if the road side romeo is a criminal.. 
Speak out, complain if you must. But unless you are trained in self defense, do not get into altercations with people you don't know. 

Woo him this Diwali !

Prescript : I m no expert in wooing :D :D Follow at your own risk.. This is Something I was planning for my blog and thought about posting here too since Darlings of Venus is not having any posts scheduled yet for this week.. 

Its the biggg festival of the year- Diwali!! Wish you all a very happy Diwali!

So the entire week has been busy- shopping, cooking, cleaning and now you look like a pan cake and all dolled up for the festival, yea? 

Well you could still sneak a little bit of time and make it special for love ;)

1.. Try making his favorite sweets.. And if he happens to be fussy over food ( like S !! :P) , then simply get creative with chocolates! Yes they are lifesavers, antidepressants and aphrodites! Do I say more??

2..Give him a nice long massage on Narakchaturdashi ( hehe sounds funny but that is the day you are supposed to be having a good oil massage and a long bath with utna- a kind of herbal powder used for the abhyanga snan or the purifying bath)

3. So you have lit up the entire house and neighborhood with those colorful, floating diyas then why spare the bedroom? ;)

Save up a few and light your bedroom with those aromatherapy candles for your rendezvous with love

4. You have shopped, shopped and shopped till you dropped.. So play a little dressing up for him.. Do some wooing with your sexxy dress :) 

      

Dress for His eyes only :)

5. Make a handmade gift for him.. A card with happy pictures of you two could be a win win one! 

5.. Play games with him.. No not the mind games darling..  If it is the Diwali time card games, then make him your partner and give naughty hints to him all the way ;) and it is only you two playing then make up conditions to be fulfilled for the one who loses! IT should be SUPER fun!

If you are wondering which of these you can do and the answer is none, do not worry.. You can still score points with him by doing NOTHING :D :D 

Guys are easy to please sometimes ;)

-- Do not comment on how the friends' or neighbors' guy helped her clean the house, took her shopping etc etc and you have a happy guy!

-- Let him party with his dudes without reminding him to control the booze :P :P 

-- Don't call him when he is gone to Momma to celebrate diwali.. Pamper yourself at the parlor to keep your mind off the temptation or plan a girls' day out :D :D 

Soo easy no? Its simple being the girl sometimes :D :D 

Have a great Diwali people! 

All that revolves around the V!

Prescript: All the ideas and thoughts mentioned here are strictly my individual opinions. I apologize before hand if any sentiments here are hurt for it is unintentional. All images used are from google. 

        The V in question here is the much talked and hyped about - Virginity. Of the many events that are truly life defining for a women, losing virginity is one of the most tabooed and discussed one. Before I venture into the topic of discussion let me just say it aloud for the underage readers of this blog yes there are many and simply putting the topic out of reach for them is useless that sex with an individual below 18 is legally called rape even if the concerned minor has consented to the coitus. 

        At the heart of it, virginity is a matter of choice. What drives this choice? No it has nothing to do with moral or sanskaars of a bhartiya naari. The libido and the desire to be loved is same in both genders. But the restraints of exploring this sensuality rests only on the fairer gender. Don't tell me that morals or upbringing makes the woman choose virginity because that is not the same when it comes to some fondling and petting that is the other forms of expressing love physically. It could be a choice of self control when the girl is still not sure about her relation. 

        Here I would say, if you don't feel comfortable with the idea of losing your V but love your partner a lot then DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT fall into the trap of , "Don't you love me?" or "Don't you trust me?" asked by him and jump on to the bed to prove that you do! 

        Then there is another story, when both partners decide to stay away till marriage (ironically the marriage only a few months away) and show this amazing sanskaar of theirs.

       

 Lack of opportunity?? Now no kidding here, in times when virginity is put on auction and can fetch you whatever sum of amount you want, lack of opportunity still can happen to a woman! However liberal a woman may be, she wants her first time to be memorable and with someone who loves her. No love, no chance! 

    

Women take the term "making love" seriously. I don't think inspite of all the freedom talks, women really want to lose it just for the sake of  "experience". There may be a few but they are hardly any numbers to go by except in Chetan Bhagat books. Women may be open to physical intimacies before marriage but remember that we are in India.

   India,  country where still in certain parts, marriage between a man and woman is consummated on white sheets and that sheet shown to the entire community the next day embarassing and shaming the bride. If that membrane of hers betrays her then she is an outcaste from the household and community. 

   A country where a male child is proudly named Arjun after the great warrior never mind how many marriages he and his brothers cumulatively had but no one dare name their daughter Draupadi! 

  Here a man is known for his merits and a woman judged by the presence or absence of a membrane called hymen. 

  By now it is quite clear what makes the choice for the women, yes -- fear of the outcome. 

  

By outcome I do not mean just  that bundle of joy who would be disowned in a garbage bin or better aborted!

Its 21st century and we are all well aware and educated never mind those blushing aunties who came to teach us life science and ended up with some bee business about the precautions and protections to be taken. 

If not precaution we know the miraculous pills that can correct our errors.

The fear here is of losing the respect.. Yes I m just echoing out aloud what most of us think..

Fear of losing the interest of the guy for whom the chase is over. Fear of those scandals and those cameras which could pay anything to get a peek at our most personal moments.  Fear of the guy.. What if he turns out the wrong one and you want to move on? What if he wags his tongue against the girl who leaves him? What if it was just a game for him? 

If the guy is perfect, then fear of doubt.. What if he thinks , if she could do with me she's really easy.. she could do it with anyone.. Yes this is real! very real! Still need proof?? Go watch Dev D! 

I once again stress that it is FEAR and by that I do not mean that all guys think the same about women who trust them enough to take this step. 

Then there is always the looming fear of getting caught and the shame that will fall upon the girl never mind the guy, he was getting some experience while the girl was the slut.

Sometimes a physical relation does add complexities.. I heard this somewhere from someone I know " Getting sexually active, is like giving the tiger its first taste of human flesh, it wont stop". The fear of that quotient changing is always there. 

But above everything else, a girl wants her first time to be secure and memorable.. Isn't it kind of funny how if a girl has had that experience before marriage society treats it so different than the much filmy suhaagraat! 

Like many things that we sacrifice all our life, so is this choice .. the fear of breaking the constraints.. 

It is hypocritic how majority women scorn upon sex with a stranger and yet majority of the women believe in arranged marriages! 

At the end of my post, I would still say that, "Your body, your choice." No one has the right to judge you for your boldness to accept the needs of your body. Neither does anyone has the right to laugh on you for your CHOICE of not getting into bed for the heck of it ! 

P.S : I m actually surprised why the outspoken and expressive girls have not yet come with a post for the discussion. I thought I would be the last due to all the exam thing and schedule! Once again I would say the option of posting anonymously is open darlings.. Only me and 2 admins would know who wrote and we would not disclose it here. I sense that there is hesitation to write on this topic. Please feel free to choose the anonymity! No judging on that!